It’s not personal!

The.Daily.Spoon

It’s Not Personal, It’s Feedback

Raise your hand if you’ve ever felt personally victimized by feedback. Opening yourself up for evaluation is incredibly vulnerable, and when a friend recently DM’d me a Leo starter pack (leave it to meme culture), which read “Feedback as a personal attack”, we lol’d for many messages thereafter. Call me assessment-adverse, but this one hit home.


Embrace the attention

We’ve all felt that clammy-palmed, stomach-sinking feeling before someone offers their thoughts and critiques on our work, often leaving us to overthink and overcompensate (It’s not just a Leo thing, right?!).

Much of the conversation surrounding feedback defaults to ways in which it could best be delivered—not received. Sure, our educational institutions implement practices like the grading system, project critiques, and peer reviews in an attempt to teach us how to welcome evaluation with open arms, yet we often lack the ability to embrace opposition by virtue of our own excuses.

Bottom line: Feedback is important and when receptive to it, it can be immensely beneficial to our own self-worth and autonomy. “If you’re passionate or care a lot about your work, of course, you feel close to it and feedback can feel unnecessarily critical or even mean,” says Emily Ramshaw, Country Lead for Bumble in Canada. “[But] the decision to act on feedback represents growth.”

Give yourself space to process!

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