Wife worker whore script
Wife worker whore script THEA 101
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This 92 page Bundle was uploaded by DeMarcos Lowery on Wednesday March 2, 2016. The Bundle belongs to THEA 101 at Southern Illinois University Carbondale taught by elizabeth elliott in Spring 2016. Since its upload, it has received 223 views.
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Date Created: 03/02/16
WIFE/WORKER/WHORE Kirsten Easton 91 Jan Ln #1 De Soto, IL 62924 firstname.lastname@example.org 909-229-2719 Draft 7 2/21/16 CHARACTERS BABY 18 Female A naïve dreamer. FRANKIE 21 Male Baby’s husband; Has old-school family values. LYNN 16 Female Baby’s sister; Mature for her age. DONNA 20 Female A woman in a man’s world. EDDY Late 30s Male The frat boy who never grew up. MORRIS Late 40s Male A cherry cordial; Hard exterior, gooey center. SCARLETT 24 Female Principled but open for adventure. LIZ Late 40s Female Glamorous, beautiful and in it for the money. JAVIER Late 50s Male An exotic and interesting older gentleman. SETTING Wife- A modest kitchen; Worker- LAPD office; Whore- a hotel room TIME The present; 1 year ago; 4 years ago. 1 BABY and FRANKIE enter their new apartment. They carry in suitcases and boxes with them. FRANKIE This is it. BABY This is… it. FRANKIE We’re married now. BABY We’re married. FRANKIE When you walked down that aisle, all I could think was, wow, I get to marry that girl! BABY You’re so sweet, Frankie. FRANKIE Well, you’re my Baby. BABY I am now. FRANKIE It’s you and me, Baby. You and me. BABY It’s so weird. I’ve been thinking about our wedding vows. We promised to grow old together. To spend Christmases and Thanksgivings together. FRANKIE And birthdays and anniversaries. BABY Those too. And when we’re old wear matching track suits and walk around the neighborhood together. FRANKIE Our vows didn’t say anything about matching track suits. 2 BABY And, at the end of your day at work, you’ll come home and I’ll be waiting for you, with pot- roast and mashed potatoes on the table. FRANKIE That sounds nice. BABY It does, doesn’t it? FRANKIE I know that our relationship hasn’t been the most…traditional. DONNA sits in chair facing a large police sergeant’s desk. Across from her sitting behind the desk is SERGEANT MORRIS. MORRIS As I was saying, we’ve recently gotten information about a prostitution ring that we are trying to investigate. We’re going to need all hands on deck for this operation, Officer Kinkart. DONNA I am more than ready to help. MORRIS That’s good to hear. We’re still trying to get an I.D. on the madam. Officer Hammond thinks he has an inside source. DONNA Really? MORRIS He thinks he might be able to get one of the girls involved to give us some information. But we’re going to work as many angles as we can. We’ll need some officers to go undercover, pose as johns. DONNA So, where do I fit into all of this? I don’t think prostitutes would believe that I was in need of their services. MORRIS There might be paperwork, planning, whatever is needed. DONNA And my other cases with Officer Hammond? 3 MORRIS Those will need to be put on hold for a while DONNA If you think that’s best. MORRIS See, that’s what I like about you. Always willing to do what the team needs most. DONNA That’s good to know…. because I’ve been meaning to talk to you about something. SCARLETT enters LIZ’s hotel room. LIZ You’re back. SCARLETT I’m back. LIZ I knew you would be. I have a sixth sense about these kinds of things. SCARLETT I should have expected no less from you, Liz. LIZ Although I’m a little… how do I say this? Confused about what you’re wearing. SCARLETT Is there something wrong with what I’m wearing? LIZ It’s a little obvious, don’t you think? SCARLETT I thought I should look…. sexy? LIZ You’ve seen the web-site, yes? SCARLETT Yes. 4 LIZ What do my girls look like? SCARLETT They’re very pretty. LIZ It’s more than just being pretty. You are a very beautiful girl. SCARLETT Oh. Thank you. LIZ But in this business, that’s not enough. They wear their hair long and down in big curls. You’re wearing a pony-tail. Their nails are painted, not chewed. Their dresses probably cost as much as your rent. They look, well, expensive. And my clients are paying good money. They aren’t Richard Gere looking for a Julia Roberts. They want more than just a good fuck. They want a companion. A woman who can hold her own. BABY I know. But that doesn’t mean that we can’t make the most out of it. That doesn’t mean we can’t be your typical husband and wife. FRANKIE If you had asked me six months ago, if my life would look like this, I would have told you that you were crazy. BABY You mean you never would have believed that you would meet a girl at a school dance that you would fall head over heels for, have sex with and then marry 8 months later? FRANKIE I don’t know if I would tell the story that exact way. You’re not pregnant or anything. Our families are just- BABY Religious? Sometimes I wonder if we had just been able to keep our hands off of each other if things would have turned out a little differently. Our parents seemed to be fine with us dating. FRANKIE Are you saying that you’re not happy? MORRIS What are you saying? 5 DONNA Well, I know that there is a position open for an officer with my experience. It’s a higher pay grade and I would get to work better hours. I know when you think LAPD officer, I’m not the traditional image that comes to mind, but I was thinking that I could be considered for that position. MORRIS We’ve already made a decision about that position. DONNA Oh. MORRIS We had many candidates to choose from. Many good officers here on the force, as you well know. DONNA Yes, of course. MORRIS I think you’ll be very pleased with the decision we’ve made, although it was a difficult one. I’ll let you congratulate your new supervisor, Officer Hammond, on your own. DONNA Eddy? MORRIS You seem surprised. SCARLETT I can hold my own with men. LIZ If it weren’t for your reputation, I wouldn’t have agreed to meet with you. SCARLETT Sometimes it’s the only way to get through to men. LIZ Women are very powerful creatures. 6 SCARLETT I want to feel that way. I want to feel like I have some control over what I do. And over who I do. I’ve heard women like you talk about the kind of relationships they have with clients. About the kind of sexual power that you have over them. Here I can set my own hours, I get to go to new places every day and I can make a lot of money. I didn’t go to college, so this is more money than I would have made anywhere else. LIZ A girl after my own heart. SCARLETT Sorry, should I not have mentioned the money? LIZ Why do you think I’m in this business? Sure, I meet some wonderful men that become friends, but at the end of the day, friends are not what makes the world spin round. Darling, people joke that prostitution is the oldest profession in the book. But it’s prostitutes that are the oldest, it’s capitalists. I am both. This might go without saying, but you know that you have to be open-minded in this business. SCARLETT I’ll try anything once. LIZ Well, dear, I’m willing to give you a shot. First things, first. We’ve got to get you into some nicer clothes. Don’t worry, I can let you borrow something for today. SCARLETT Thank you. (beat) Wait. Today? BABY Of course not. When I said those vows a week ago, I meant what I said. FRANKIE But? BABY I realized that I didn’t even know your middle name. Isn’t that funny? When Pastor Jay read our names aloud, all I could think was, wow, I’m marrying this man and I don’t even know his middle name. FRANKIE It’s Peter. 7 BABY I know that now. I just want to be a good wife. I want to prove to them that we can make this work. Without their shame. But when I don’t even know your middle name, I wonder- FRANKIE You are going to make me so happy, Baby. BABY I will? FRANKIE Of course. And am I going to make you happy? BABY You already have. MORRIS You two have made a fine pair out there. DONNA Thank you? MORRIS Of course this unfortunately means that you’ll be getting another partner. Hammond won’t have time to be out in the field with the new responsibilities. Officer Silva will be assigned to you. DONNA Joe Silva? MORRIS I think the two of you will work well together. DONNA (sarcastic) I’m glad that we have your blessing Sergeant Morris. MORRIS You’re always such a good sport, Officer Kinkart. I expect this new situation to be no different. DONNA That’s me, Miss Go With The Flow. MORRIS Right. 8 The meeting is over, but DONNA is still sitting there in shock. MORRIS Was there anything else that I can help you with? DONNA Uh, no. You’ll let me know where I’m needed for the upcoming investigation. MORRIS Of course. LIZ I have a client who I think would just adore you. He’s been asking for someone like you, but I hadn’t found anyone who really fit what he was looking for. He’s a little non-traditional, but you already said you aren’t a traditional gal yourself. SCARLETT And that’s happening…. today? LIZ As soon as you can get over there. SCARLETT But I wasn’t prepared for- I mean, I’m not- LIZ If you don’t think that you can handle this, then I’m sure he wouldn’t mind waiting for the next girl to come along. But who knows when that will be? SCARLETT Today works for me. LIZ Wonderful! I’ll give him a call. SCARLETT What if he doesn’t like me? LIZ Then I’m afraid that we won’t be able to strike a deal, my dear. SCARLETT I’ll go get ready. 9 SCARLETT begins to exit to the closet. LIZ I just have one more question before I send you off. SCARLETT What’s that? LIZ What would you like me to tell him your name is? SCARLETT Oh, um. Scarlett. LIZ Well alright Scarlett. Go to the closet and pick out something to wear. I’m sure there’s something in there that will fit you. SCARLETT Thank you, Liz. I think I’m going to be really good that this. LIZ I hope so. Because if you are, I am going to make you so much money, you will be wondering why you didn’t have this job your whole life. SCARLETT exits. LIZ remains, and dials her phone. LIZ Javier? Hello, darling. Have I got a surprise for you! LYNN sits at BABY’S kitchen table. LYNN So, how does it feel to be an old married lady? BABY It’s amazing. LYNN Where is your ring? BABY What ring? 10 LYNN Uh, your wedding ring? BABY I don’t have one. LYNN How do you not have a wedding ring if you just got married? BABY A ring was a little out of our price range, but we’re looking in to getting one. LYNN You mean to tell me that you got married and didn’t get a ring? BABY It doesn’t matter to me. I’m just so happy to be Frankie’s wife. LYNN Really? BABY You seem surprised. LYNN It’s not like it happened under the best of circumstances. DONNA sits at her desk, filling out paperwork. EDDY enters wearing the remnants of a party on him (think streamers, a party hat, etc.) EDDY Oh hey there, Donna. DONNA Hi Eddy. EDDY Those guys are animals. Animals, I tell you! DONNA You don’t need to tell me that. 11 EDDY To celebrate, they took me to a strip club. For lunch! Usually it’s just those restaurants where the waitresses stick their tits in your face while you pay nine bucks for a ham sandwich, but this, well, this really took the cake! DONNA The strip club served lunch? EDDY Oh sure. They had a buffet. All sorts of stuff. Chicken wings. Macaroni and cheese. DONNA Sounds festive. EDDY Sorry you couldn’t make it. DONNA I wasn’t invited. EDDY Oh, haven’t you heard? DONNA I guess congratulations are in order? EDDY They are indeed. DONNA It’s quite a promotion. EDDY It’s too bad that we won’t be working together anymore. DONNA Not in the field, at least. EDDY We won’t be working together in the office. I’ll be your boss. DONNA If that’s how you want to look at it. A knock at JAVIER’s hotel room door. JAVIER goes to answer it. SCARLETT enters. 12 JAVIER You must be Scarlett. SCARLETT That’s me. JAVIER Liz told me all about you. I am very excited to meet a woman like you, Scarlett. SCARLETT It’s nice to meet you too. JAVIER First things first. For your time. JAVIER hands her an envelope. SCARLETT Thank you. SCARLETT kisses JAVIER and begins furiously trying to unbutton his shirt. JAVIER What are you doing there? SCARLETT I’m having trouble with your buttons. JAVIER There’s no need for that right now. SCARLETT I’m sorry. I thought you might want to jump right into things. JAVIER I’d like to talk to you first. Get a sense of who you are. SCARLETT I feel like I should have brought my resume. JAVIER And what would your resume say? 13 SCARLETT (joking) What category would blow jobs go under? JAVIER There’s no need to be nervous. SCARLETT Sorry. I wasn’t, uh, I wasn’t sure how quickly we should start. JAVIER Not to worry. Come sit closer to me. SCARLETT Oh okay. SCARLETT tries again to ferociously unbutton his shirt. JAVIER You are very eager, aren’t you? SCARLETT (trying to play her mistake off) You’re just so attractive, I can hardly keep me hands off of you. JAVIER You are a very good liar. SCARLETT Apparently not. BABY You know that mom wanted us to get married as soon as possible. And it’s not like Frankie’s parents make a lot of money. LYNN I don’t get it though. Why couldn’t you just have waited? BABY Waited for what? LYNN To have sex. 14 BABY It’s not like I didn’t try. But sometimes boys want things. And you don’t want them to get those things from someone else. LYNN You slept with Frankie so that he wouldn’t break up with you? BABY Oh Lynnie, you’re too young to be talking about this with me! LYNN I’m sixteen. I’m not a little girl anymore. BABY You’ll always be my little sister. LYNN I’m only two years younger than you. BABY You didn’t fly from middle of nowhere New York to Los Angeles to pry into the personal details of my life, did you? LYNN Well, what else are we going to do? EDDY Look, Donna, I know that you wanted to be considered for this job but- DONNA What could you possibly say that would make any difference? EDDY Oh come on, hear me out. I just wanted to say, no hard feelings. DONNA Fine. No hard feelings, boss. EDDY Well I would appreciate if you didn’t call me Eddy in front of the other officers. DONNA God forbid they knew that I know your first name. 15 EDDY I don’t understand why you’re so upset. We were partners. If you had gotten the position, I would be happy for you. DONNA You would, huh? EDDY Sure. I would have taken you to lunch… or something. DONNA No offense Eddy, but strippers aren’t really my type. EDDY You’re so superior, aren’t you? Those girls are just trying to make a little cash. DONNA Don’t you think it seems like a conflict of interest? A bunch of cops going to a place where girls sell themselves for money? Especially in light of this new investigation. EDDY Stripping is perfectly legal. DONNA Just not the stuff that happens in the back rooms. EDDY How do you think I got this inside contact? DONNA Are you serious? EDDY Of course not. When did you become such a prude? DONNA I’m not. EDDY Look, it’s not my fault that you didn’t get the promotion. But maybe you should focus on the job. And next time a new position opens up, you can get that one. DONNA So I’m just supposed to shut up and make you and Silva look good? 16 EDDY I didn’t say that. But I’m not saying not to do that, either. DONNA You are a piece of work, Eddy. EDDY Have you considered that maybe you didn’t deserve that promotion? SCARLETT What do you want to talk about? JAVIER I don’t know how much Liz told you about me. SCARLETT Not much, really. JAVIER I’ve known Liz for several years. She’s a wonderful woman. And she knows how to run a business. SCARLETT Indeed, she does. JAVIER I’m a businessman myself. I know how difficult it can be to cater to your different clients’ needs. SCARLETT Are you saying that you’re a difficult customer? JAVIER Not difficult. Just one with many different desires. SCARLETT Like what? JAVIER Let’s just say that I’ve been waiting for a girl like you for a while. Liz has a lot of beautiful and talented women who work for her, but you have something special. SCARLETT Oh, I’m sure you say that to all of the women that you see. 17 JAVIER I wouldn’t have gotten as far as I have in life if I wasn’t a little bit charming. SCARLETT I suppose I could say the same thing. JAVIER I’m sure you haven’t thought of this yet, because you’re on the other side of things, but this isn’t just about sex. It’s nice to have a woman that I can talk to, to just be with. I’d like us to be great friends, Scarlett. SCARLETT I would like that too. BABY We could go to the beach. Walk around. LYNN It’s so hot out. BABY It’s not that hot. LYNN I’ll bet it never even rains here. BABY It has to rain sometimes. LYNN You know I want to move out here too, when I graduate from high school. BABY What do you want to do here? LYNN What do you do? BABY I’m married. LYNN And? BABY Being someone’s wife is a job. 18 LYNN That just sounds like life. That doesn’t sound like a job. BABY Mom always had to work. She couldn’t depend on Dad to bring home enough to support us all. But I don’t have to. I can stay home and take care of all of the things that need to be done here. LYNN How can you call yourself a wife if you don’t even have a ring on your finger? BABY Why are you so obsessed with my marriage, Lynnie? LYNN I’m just saying, everyone from back home knows why you got married. It isn’t enough to just say you’re happy to prove that you got married for the right reason. Do you remember when Cheryl Anne married that guy? How everyone made fun of her for only being with him 3 months. But once she showed them the rock he bought her, everyone shut up. BABY I never saw it. LYNN Everyone thought they were only getting married for one reason. But you don’t buy a nice ring like that for some girl that you aren’t planning to have be the mother of your children. A ring means you’re serious. BABY I don’t think I need a piece of jewelry to prove that my husband loves me. LYNN But how will people know that you’re even married? You could go to the grocery store or the mall and no one would know. Isn’t that the point of a ring? To show strangers that someone loves you? The people back home are back home. But what about the people who live here? DONNA I’ve been here longer than you have! EDDY It’s not always about seniority. DONNA Then what’s it about? 19 EDDY All I’m saying is that people have different strengths. People are good at different things. DONNA So you’re saying I’m not good at my job. EDDY I’m saying that maybe you have some talents that you aren’t using. DONNA Like what? EDDY For starters, do you ever wear your hair down? Like ever? DONNA What does my hair have to do with this? EDDY I’m saying that there’s no use trying to get ahead acting like one of the guys. It only makes the other guys look better, especially with Morris. You should try being one of the girls. I think it will go a lot further with him. DONNA I don’t think they make this uniform in pink. EDDY You know Officer Vickers? She works nights. DONNA Shelly Vickers? That girl who sleeps with everyone in the office? EDDY She used to be an intern. Only worked here for 6 months before she got promoted. Now she’s making more money than I am. DONNA What are you suggesting, boss? EDDY I’m not saying it’s right. I’m just saying that’s how things are. DONNA You’re saying that I should do what Shelly Vickers did? 20 EDDY Donna, this is just how working here is. You’re a woman in a man’s world. DONNA Well, congratu-fucking-lations Eddy. Oh sorry, It’s Officer Hammond now, right? EDDY Don’t be sore about it. I already told you, the next one’s yours. DONNA Apparently the next one is Shelly Vickers’. EDDY It’s up to you whose it is. DONNA Morris is a happily married man. His wife helps plan the Christmas party every year. EDDY I wouldn’t be so sure about happily. Just saying. DONNA You’ve been “just saying” a lot of things tonight. EDDY The job is yours for the taking. If you want it. JAVIER You and I are going to have such a wonderful time together. SCARLETT Did you have something specific in mind? JAVIER Not tonight. I’d like to see you tomorrow, if that’s alright with you. SCARLETT Are you sure? You paid for the whole hour. JAVIER The anticipation is almost as exciting as the actual act. SCARLETT I can see how that would be true. 21 JAVIER I’ll send you specific instructions for what I would like. If you’re up for it, I’ll see you then. SCARLETT Until tomorrow, my friend. SCARLETT exits. FRANKIE enters. BABY How was your day at work, Frankie? FRANKIE It was fine. BABY Just fine? FRANKIE Is dinner ready? BABY Of course. I made your favorite. Meatloaf. FRANKIE You did? BABY And mashed potatoes. And peas and carrots. FRANKIE You’d think it was my birthday, wouldn’t you? BABY Can’t a wife just do something nice for her husband? FRANKIE I don’t know, can she? BABY Did you have a bad day? FRANKIE It was just long. My uncle has been really hard on me lately. 22 BABY It’s probably just a period of adjustment. Things will get better soon. FRANKIE Let’s hope. BABY I did want to talk to you about something. FRANKIE It’s been a long day, Baby. Can we just sit here and enjoy this meal and then talk after? BABY Okay. They sit in silence, eating for a few beats. FRANKIE See, isn’t this nice? BABY nods. More silence. Then- BABY Do you still think about our wedding? DONNA knocks on Sergeant Morris’ door. She looks like she spent a few extra minutes in front of the mirror- extra lipstick, hair down. DONNA Knock. Knock. MORRIS Hello there Officer Kinkart. You look nice today. Something different? DONNA I don’t think so. MORRIS Did you do something different with your hair? DONNA Oh, sometimes I wear it down. MORRIS Whatever it is, you look nice. 23 DONNA Thank you. How has your day been? MORRIS Oh, not too bad. I’m catching up on a little paperwork. I fell behind last week. DONNA That’s good. That you’re catching up, I mean. MORRIS Yes. I suppose so. What is it that brings you here? DONNA Can’t a girl come by every now and then to say hello to her boss? MORRIS I think we’ve already dispensed with the greetings. DONNA I mean more than just hello, how are you doing? I wanted to see if maybe you wanted to get some coffee? Together? MORRIS I still have half a cup. My secretary brings it to me every morning. I take it with two sugars. DONNA Oh. Okay. Well then, I guess I will be on my way back to my desk. MORRIS Have a good day, Officer. DONNA begins to exit, but stops herself. DONNA I just wanted to say that there aren’t any hard feelings about Officer Hammond getting the position. He and I spoke about it and I realized that we have different strengths. And perhaps that the position that he received was better suited to him because of those strengths. MORRIS I’m glad you feel that way. DONNA But I was wondering if you knew what my particular strengths were? 24 FRANKIE What kind of question is that? BABY Do you still think about it? FRANKIE Of course I do. BABY What do you remember about it? FRANKIE Well, you wore a white dress. I wore a tie. The same man who baptized me as a baby was the one who asked me to say “I do”. Is that what you’re asking? BABY Did it seem like something was missing? FRANKIE Baby, we can’t change the fact that we had to plan the wedding in a couple of week. Or the fact that the only people who were there were our parents and siblings. But that doesn’t mean that we don’t love each other more than people who have the big event with a band, flowers and a giant cake. BABY But don’t you think there are ways to show the world how much we love each other? FRANKIE I think it would have been pretty difficult to get the whole world to fit in that tiny church in upstate New York. BABY That’s not what I’m talking about. FRANKIE Let’s just enjoy this dinner. You must have spent a while making it. BABY I did. I know how much it means to you. The meatloaf, that is. FRANKIE Yeah, I really like meatloaf. BABY Some might even see this meatloaf as a token of my affection for you. 25 FRANKIE Some might say that. BABY A symbol of my love. FRANKIE Are we still talking about meatloaf? BABY I know that I said that it didn’t matter to me, but I realized that it does. FRANKIE What are you talking about? MORRIS And what might these seemingly hidden strengths be? DONNA goes and sits on the edge of his desk. DONNA For one, I’m a very good team player. I’m always willing to serve the needs of others. MORRIS I heard that you and Officer Silva have been working well together. DONNA I get along well with all of the other officers. But I especially want to make sure that my boss is happy. MORRIS I have been very satisfied with your work, Officer Kinkart. The paperwork that you’ve already done for this prostitution investigation has been instrumental to our success thus far. DONNA I’m glad. I am so glad that you feel satisfied. MORRIS Is that all? DONNA That was only one strength. 26 MORRIS Was it? DONNA In addition to being a team player I am also very good at anticipating the needs of others. Of this department even. MORRIS That’s not really in your job description. DONNA Oh, I know. But I just can’t help it sometimes. I see that Officer Silva needs me to call back- up, I call before he even asks. When the water container gets low, I refill it before it’s out. So if there’s something that you need, I’ll know it before you even know you need it. That’s just the way I am. MORRIS That’s good to know Officer Kinkart. DONNA Please, call me Donna. MORRIS Officer Kinkart seems appropriate in a professional environment. DONNA But we’re more than just boss and employee aren’t we, Dan? I’d like to think that our relationship was a little more intimate than that. MORRIS During the Christmas party or the occasional barbeque, I don’t mind if you call me Dan. But here, in this office, it would behoove you to call me Sergeant Morris. DONNA I apologize. It’s just such a welcoming environment, it must have slipped. MORRIS That’s quite alright. I will let it slide this time. DONNA But what would happen the next time I called you Dan in this office? MORRIS I don’t understand. 27 BABY A ring, Frankie! I want a wedding ring! FRANKIE You know I can’t afford something like that. BABY Not even something that was small, but still nice? FRANKIE We talked about this. We spent everything I saved moving out here. And I’m just starting out at my uncle’s construction company. There isn’t any money for a ring, Baby. I’m sorry. BABY Aren’t you worried that if I’m out at the grocery store some man will try to ask me out because I don’t have a ring? FRANKIE Has that happened? BABY It hasn’t yet. But it could. FRANKIE I would hope you would tell him to back off because you’re married to me. BABY What if he’s persistent? FRANKIE Why are we having this conversation about a man that doesn’t even exist? BABY Because, I feel like I’m not really your wife without a ring to prove it. DONNA Would you have to punish me? MORRIS I suppose after a few infractions, I would have to put you on probation. DONNA Would you have to spank me? MORRIS Excuse me? 28 DONNA I think that might make it easier to remember. MORRIS Officer Kinkart- DONNA Donna. MORRIS I think you had better leave this office before this escalates further than you think it will. DONNA Maybe I want things to escalate. MORRIS Before you lose your job. DONNA Oh my god. I’m so sorry. MORRIS I think you should leave. Now. DONNA Really, I uh- I’m sorry. DONNA exits. BABY washes dishes as FRANKIE sits at the kitchen table finishing his dinner. She’s wearing a robe. BABY You never told me. How was your day today? FRANKIE I woke up. I went to work. I moved dirt and bricks. Then I came home. Pretty exciting stuff isn’t it? BABY I’m sure it’s a little more complicated than that. FRANKIE Not really. I’m a simple man with simple pleasures. 29 A silence. Neither knows how to move the conversation forward. BABY Aren’t you going to ask me how my day was? FRANKIE How was your day? BABY Well I was on the phone with my mother this morning for two hours. She said that Lynn wants to come stay here again. I think she isn’t sure how to handle her. Lynn’s a little strong-willed. FRANKIE Isn’t she still in school? BABY It would just be for the summer. FRANKIE Geez. Two hours. I wish I had two hours to spend on the phone with anyone. Even with my mother. BABY I told her that I’d have to discuss it with you first. FRANKIE I suppose that’s fine. BABY I can make up the couch for her at night. FRANKIE I already agreed. BABY I know. I just don’t want you being mean to her while she’s here if you agreed to let her stay. FRANKIE Mean to her? Why would I be mean to her? BABY I don’t know. Last time she was here you two didn’t ever seem to hit it off. 30 FRANKIE She’s only sixteen. It’s not like I have a lot in common with a sixteen year-old girl. BABY I guess that’s true. BABY moves over to FRANKIE and throws her arms around his neck from behind him. BABY I’m sorry you’ve had a bad day. I can make it better. FRANKIE You don’t have to. BABY Don’t you want me to give you a massage? FRANKIE Are you sure? BABY Your neck is very tight. BABY massages FRANKIE’s neck. FRANKIE Ow. Ow. You’re pressing too hard. BABY Oh, sorry. I wasn’t trying to- FRANKIE I think I just want to lie on the couch. BABY Really? DONNA sits at her desk working. MORRIS enters. DONNA Sergeant Morris. MORRIS Don’t get up. 31 DONNA I just want to say that I am really sorry for what happened the other day. I was completely out of line. MORRIS I appreciate the apology, but it isn’t necessary. DONNA No, really. I crossed a boundary that I shouldn’t have. MORRIS Did you? DONNA I don’t know what came over me. Really. It won’t happen again. MORRIS What if I want it to happen again? SCARLETT knocks on a hotel room door. JAVIER opens the door. SCARLETT I’ve gotten a noise complaint for this room. JAVIER Really? I don’t know what that could have been from. SCARLETT May I come in, sir? JAVIER Please, officer. SCARLETT enters JAVIER’s hotel room wearing a sexy cop costume. SCARLETT Sir, this is a hotel, not a club. We cannot have patrons playing their music loudly. JAVIER I wasn’t playing music, officer. SCARLETT Then perhaps you were making noise some other way? 32 JAVIER I’m not sure what it could have been. SCARLETT Television volume up too loud? Or perhaps you were the one making the noise? JAVIER Really. You must have me confused with someone else. SCARLETT I don’t like to have to do this, but you are being very uncooperative, sir. JAVIER Do what? SCARLETT gets a pair of handcuffs out. SCARLETT Please put your wrists together in front of you. JAVIER This seems awfully severe for a noise complaint. BABY I can keep going if you want. I won’t press as hard. FRANKIE That’s okay. BABY Are you sure you wanted to watch T.V.? We could spend time together. FRANKIE Doing what? BABY I don’t know… what do you want to do? FRANKIE Watch T.V. BABY I could massage you other places. (she coughs) Besides your neck. 33 FRANKIE Oh really? BABY Mmmhmm. FRANKIE Like where? BABY Are there any areas that feel tight to you? FRANKIE Perhaps. BABY loosens her robe. FRANKIE What are you wearing underneath that robe? BABY Wouldn’t you like to know? DONNA What? MORRIS My office is in the front of the building. My walls are made out of glass. I can’t have young beautiful officers coming onto me in front of everyone. DONNA You think I’m beautiful? MORRIS It’s no secret that you’re a beautiful woman. Half of the men who work here have either slept with you or wanted to sleep with you. DONNA How do you know about that? MORRIS What I’m trying to say is that if I wanted something to happen between the two of us, it can’t happen in my office. 34 DONNA Oh. MORRIS Which is why I had to be so brusque with you the other day. DONNA I understand. MORRIS But we aren’t in my office right now, are we? SCARLETT I take my job very seriously. SCARLETT cuffs JAVIER’s hands. SCARLETT Now, would you like to change your story? JAVIER Please, officer, I didn’t mean to do it. SCARLETT Ah, so you admit that it was you. JAVIER You have to understand. SCARLETT I think I should have to punish you for what you’ve done. Take you down to the station. JAVIER What are you going to do to me there? SCARLETT Do you like those cuffs on your wrists? JAVIER No. SCARLETT No what? JAVIER No ma’am. 35 SCARLETT Well then you aren’t going to like what’s going to happen to you down at the station. JAVIER Please don’t take me down to the station. We can settle this here. You can un-cuff me. SCARLETT I think you’ve forgotten that I’m the one who calls the shots here, not you. JAVIER You’re right. I’m sorry. Can we please settle this here? SCARLETT How are you going to convince me that I should let you go? FRANKIE Geez, what’s gotten into you? You’re never like this. BABY I just wanted to remind you of how good a wife I am. FRANKIE You’re looking pretty good right now. BABY And I thought, if I was doing something nice for you, that you could consider doing something nice for me. FRANKIE Why don’t you take that robe off and we’ll see? BABY What if you consider the thing for me before I take it off? FRANKIE What is it that you want? BABY My left hand has been feeling awfully light. FRANKIE I don’t get it. BABY I want to be your wife and I want everyone to know it. I want a ring. 36 FRANKIE Baby… BABY I do something for you, you do something for me. Isn’t that what marriage is all about? FRANKIE I’ll try, Baby. I’ll try. Now please, take that robe off. BABY slips the robe off. FRANKIE picks her up and carries her off. MORRIS If your offer still stands- DONNA It does. MORRIS I’m interested. She moves in to him and kisses him.
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