Intimate Relationships & Marriage Exam 2 Study Guide
Intimate Relationships & Marriage Exam 2 Study Guide HDFS 1610
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This 6 page Study Guide was uploaded by Lindsay Smith on Thursday September 29, 2016. The Study Guide belongs to HDFS 1610 at University of Missouri - Columbia taught by Luke Russell in Fall 2016. Since its upload, it has received 41 views. For similar materials see Intimate Relationships and Marriage in Human Development & Family Science (HDFS) at University of Missouri - Columbia.
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Date Created: 09/29/16
Intimate Relationships & Marriage Study Guide Ch. 4-6 In-Class Review Outline: Baucom & Epstein’s 1990 Typology of Social Cogs* Importance of 1 impressions* Impression management & techniques* Relationship enhancing & distressing attribution patterns* Romantic and disadvantageous standards* Destiny v. Growth Beliefs* Functions of Nonverbal Comm. * Facial Expressions, interpersonal space, gazing* Gottman’s 4 Horseman of the Apocalypse for Affection* Role of Secrets (testing), Taboos, Self-Disclosure* Comm. Styles (gender, encoding/decoding, masters v. disasters) VID* Outcomes, CL, CLalts (Satisfaction v. Stability)* Equity theory, mutuality, overbenefitted v. underbenefitted Types of Commitment Ch. 4 – Social Cognition Vocab: Cognitions: What you think Feelings: emotions, what you feel. Positive Illusions: overlook negative traits, play up positive ones Primacy effect: 1 thing we learn about someone sticks most Confirmation bias: key in on info. that confirms thoughts Overconfidence: think they know partners more than they do Need to know: Baucom/Epstein’s 1990 Typology- Perceptions: what attention is drawn too Expectancies: thoughts on how people will respond Attributions: how we explain other’s behaviors Assumptions: ideas we hold about the way relationships generally are Standards: ideas of how the way relationships should be Actor/Observer Effect: explain your behavior internally, other’s behavior externally EX): I donate to charity cause I’m nice My friend donates to charity to maker herself look well Social cogs form by: Past experience Family culture Media Research Other Romantic Assumptions: Love is the most important basis for choosing a mate Love will be perfect There is only one perfect, “true” love True love can overcome any obstacle st Love is possible at 1 sight Disadvantageous Assumptions: Disagreements are destructive “Mind reading” is essential Partners cannot change Sex should be perfect every time Men & women are different Great relationships just happen Types of Assumptions – Destiny Beliefs v. Growth Beliefs “It’ll just happen.” v. “Things can get better.” “That’s just the way it is.” v. “There’s room to grow.” First Impressions – takes 1/10 of a second Know – attractiveness, likeability, trustworthy After 5 seconds – extraversion, conscientiousness, intelligence (Influences later interpretations of facts about them) Impression Management Techniques: * Ingratiation: trying to get people to like you Self-promotion: seem or are similar Intimidation: be fearful or scared of me (competent or accomplished) Supplication: look incompetent at something (get out of doing it) Self-concept: + self-concept – “narcissism” - self-concept – “low self-esteem” Influences: Self-enhancement – saying positive things Self-verification – say what verifies our own thoughts Form Attributions: - Internal/external explanations - Actor/observer effects - Relationship enhancing v. distress (maintaining patterns) Ch. 5 – Communication Vocab: Alexithymia: Don’t understand emotions, don’t feel them, and no words to describe) Paralanguage: The way people say things (how) – usually nonverbal, compliments message Punctuation: describe the beginning of an interaction differently Need to know: Non-verbal Comm. Functions of Comm.: - Provide info. - Regulate interaction - Define relationships - Interpersonal influence - Impression management Facial Expressions: - Display rules - Intensity - Neutralize - Minimize - Mask (show entirely diff. emotion) Look out for – microexpressions, body movement, and leaking Gazing: Lovers> friends> acquaintances VDR- visual dominance ration “Look speak” v. “Look listen” – typical ratio 40/60 – high 60/40 Touch: Communicate emotions and dominance Interpersonal Distance: - Intimate Zone: 0” to 18” - Personal Zone: 18” to 4’ - Social Zone: 4’ to 12’ - Public Zone: 12’+ People respond well to Mimicry* Nonverbal Sensitivity: Encoding – send messages, not always verbal Decoding – read messages and interpret what they mean (guys suck at this) Prediction of Relationship Satisfaction* - Gender differences Verbal Comm. Social Penetration Themes: Breadth v. Depth (topics variety and range) Self-disclosure Reciprocity High-Opener (TMI) Understanding Marital Satisfaction- - Intimate self-disclosure - Selective secrecy Taboo – Status of relationship (DTR?) Secret Testing: rd Triangle Tests (Bring in 3 party friend to test partner on response) Endurance Tests (Ask them to do a bunch of stuff, see how long they put up w/ you) Separation Tests (Really long time w/out talking to see who caves) Signs to watch out for: Strong – idioms or “inside jokes” Weak – social degeneration (fewer topics, shallow aspects) Expressiveness v. Instrumentality Fem. v. Masc. About connection v. purpose is for info. solely Gottman’s 4 Horsemen - Criticism (kitchen sinking) - Defensiveness - Contempt - Stonewalling (shut down, not really present) Masters v. Disasters - Love Lab - Gentle in how they handle 4 Horsemen - Friendship - Love maps, culture of appreciation (recognize good before criticizing) - Turning towards, turning away, turning against (micromoments) Engaging in more Ignoring Going against what someone says - Dreams Criticism v. Complaints - Respect v. validation - Behavior description - I – statements - XYZ statements - Flooding - The 5:1 ratio (best is 17:1) Ch. 6 – Interdependency Vocab: Principle of Interest: person least tied (invested) to the relationship, has the power Exchange Relationships: keep track of exchanges Communal Relationships: It’ll all even out in the end Need to know: Social Exchange Theory – Outcomes (eval. current relationship) rewards – costs = outcome Rewards? Gifts, intimacy, sex Costs? Stress, money, time Comparison Level – what you think you should be getting in a relationship Comparison Level Alternative – what you think you could get from others Satisfaction = Outcomes – CL Stability = Outcomes – CLalt Changes in Comparison Level: How? - Passed relationships - Models from fam/friends - Rise w/ time Causes? - Satisfaction/stability decreases Cultural roles? - Family - Films - Media *Losses tend to affect us more than gains *Seek rewards and avoid punishments *No conflict, does not equal joy Relationship Scale: Approaching Goals BUT NOT Avoidance Goals = Flourishing Approaching Goals AND Avoidance Goals = Precarious NOT Approaching Goals BUT Avoidance Goals = Distressed NOT Approaching Goals AND NOT Avoidance Goals = Boring Interdependency Effects Conflict & Friction: - More affected by partners moods and behaviors - Ammunition (secrets, weaknesses) - Surprises Commitment: - Personal Commitment - Constraint Commitment - Moral Commitment (long-distance relationships) Maintenance Mechanism: - Accommodative behavior - Willingness to sacrifice - Perceived superiority (CLalt) Joy-based v. Anxiety-based relationships Equitable Relationships – proportional justice Equity Theory – “overbenefitted” v. “underbenefitted” less in, more out v. more in, less out “Economy of surplus” – try to always do a lot! Your outcomes = your partner’s outcomes Your contribution = partner’s contributions
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