Notes for weeks 4-5
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This 5 page Study Guide was uploaded by Kirsten Notetaker on Monday October 3, 2016. The Study Guide belongs to at Lewis University taught by Ms. Rzeszutko in Fall 2016. Since its upload, it has received 13 views.
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Date Created: 10/03/16
Death defying - our souls will live on, like the Egyptians thought they would come back to their bodies Death denying - happens a lot, we do not believe that we are going to die, we don't want to die, we don’t even want to think about dying, trying to keep people alive when enough is enough/quality of life is nonexistent, people do not want to experience getting old - plastic surgery/fact lift What do we experience when we experience death? The person dying The people around the dying person Losses of death People - physical people are being lost when someone is dead Control/competency - are being lost when someone is dying, can't make your own decisions, don’t know when you're going to die, the illness has taken over, you are no longer in control o Competency - being able to do something, you cannot take care of yourself, you need a lot of help to do important things like go to the bathroom o Want to give the person dying as much control over the situation as they can, once again need to allow people to feel competence as much as they can o Not having control or competency is a loss people need to grieve Plans Things - like a house, some people have to get through the process of parting with their things Body - people are literally losing parts of the body, functioning of different body parts stops, like ALS Factors that influence how we grieve Nature - the nature of the death, what is happening in the whole process of how they are dying Strength of attachment - relationships between you and the dying person and their own personal relationships, main goal is to make sure the dying person has a good death Coping behaviors and mental health - how we get through things, defense mechanisms, how you normally cope with crisis situations is how you are going to cope with grief situations , coping behaviors help us to get through Mental health - is there is a mental illness, it is going to double the grief reaction, the mental illness may interfere with a normal and healthy reaction Roles: I and people - people's roles have to have a grief process, say role is to provide money, that would be a big loss Level of maturity/intelligence - cognition, how does that person view death, education on death, maturity - the developmental process that happens, socially, environmentally, brain chemistry of how we develop Age - different ages deal with loss/grief differently Past experiences - bereavement overload, having lots of experiences with the grief process, there are usually consecutive losses Social, cultural, ethnicity, religion - without it, might not go through the grief process, do not see that there is another side to life, inward and outward expression of grief Amount of unfinished business - not having resolution to certain people at the end of life, if there is a lot of unfinished business the grief process will be harder The death surround - actual place, time, and environment where person has died Length of illness - Sudden vs. expected - what is better depends on the person Different bereavement situations Different ones just need to be handled differently Think about what it is different when losing people, like children or a parent, also suicide Death of a child Different ways of losing a child o Miscarriage o Stillborn o Illness o Accidents o Lost/runaways o Child has been taken away - DCFS Issues/factors o Social expectations There are certain things that go along with having a child As a parent it is your role it product your child Also have a role in shaping your child into a productive member of society What did the parent do to cause the child to die/runaway etc. o Loss of support Parents grieve completely differently - males and females Emotions One may blame the other Genetics Accident happened under one of their supervision o Child before parent Parent never expects the child to die before them - it is unnatural, it happens, but it is not supposed to happen Shock factor Causes a lot of guild - called parental guilt, they believe they (the parents) should have died instead of the child o Need to care for other kids Now you have to deal with your grief, but also help their remaining children deal with that grief as well Your (normal) grief reactions may cause you to not want to deal or be able to deal with and concentrate on anyone else/the needs of your children Going to continue to re-live the death of the child even when no one else really does - it takes a while to resolve Can't be TOO over-protective to the remaining kids - causes resentment over sibling for dying Parental grief response o Death causation guilt The parent feels they are the cause of the child's death They did not do good enough Was not able to protect their child o Illness related guilt It is because of me that this child has the illness My genes have this child my illness I was not there to prevent the illness from happening Not thinking normal because there is so much guilt o Parental role guilt I should have protected them more Should have spent more time with them Should have taught/helped him how to protect themselves o Survival guilt I should have died instead I'm older o Moral guilt Something that I did is why the child is dead now I did something wrong to cause this to happen Can cause a life of identity in the parent When we lose something it can cause a loss in our identity May feel like they don't know how to parent, they need to learn how to be better, they are not good enough They did something wrong, how can it be changed Overprotection over remaining children Have to lose their hopes and dreams - journaling helps o Seeing them get married RECORDING INFO HERE Have to help them understand the stages of grief - Kubler Ross! o Get them to understand there is a grief process and help them understand each stages o Their process is unique to them because the loss is so unnatural Individuals, couples, and families - remaining children o Changes each of these dynamics o Your identities in each of these situations has now changed o There is somebody missing in these situations The different developmental characteristics of their age o How do they deal with grief? o Different ages deal differently with death and grieving Predicting upsurges in grief o We want to let them know that there are certain times and occasions where the grief is harsher o Doing role-plays in therapy sessions can help Funeral rites - universal needs Support o We need help, a support system o Planning the funeral, dealing with arrangements Explain meaning of death o Spiritual beliefs - they are in a better place o Having a spiritual benefit helps us to be able to deal with the death and someone's reaction to death, spirituality gives us hope Realization/closure o Understanding that they are actually gone o Seeing the dead body - makes you see the changed relationship Grieve publically o People can cry in front of others, it is socially acceptable to do that at a funeral Body disposal o Taking care of the actual dead body o Hosting/having/attending funerals, displaying the dead body solidifies this changed relationship Benefits Psychological o Reinforces reality o Acknowledges and expresses the grief o Recollection - reminiscing helps the grief process, putting together picture boards Social o Support o Things to do o Back to community Spiritual o Nature of body - spirt o Elsewhere o Own life - take a look at your own life, appreciate it, make changes o Eulogy process Burials Earth burial - buried in the ground, cemeteries, most popular, the Catholics did not support cremation Cremation Entombment Funeral process - 5 parts Removal of the body o Moving them from where they died - hospital, car accident, house o Mortician - the undertaker o Do you want to witness that? Visitation o Body goes to funeral home, or place of cremation o Different religions have different procedures to the funeral process o The wake Funeral rite o Mass/services o Ritualistic part - spiritual traditions Passed down from generations Gives grievers meaning as to where the individual is going o Cross over of the body and soul Procession o Going from the church, funeral home, etc. to the cemetery or where ever they will rest o Reminiscing of neighborhood, where you grew up - not so much any more o Honoring their life where on Earth o Convenient Committal o Where the person will be laid to rest o Convenient o Helps with the grieving process
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