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test 3

by: Jackie F.
Jackie F.
GPA 3.7

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Interpersonal Communication
Valerie Giroux
Study Guide
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This 5 page Study Guide was uploaded by Jackie F. on Wednesday December 9, 2015. The Study Guide belongs to COS 112 at University of Miami taught by Valerie Giroux in Fall 2015. Since its upload, it has received 34 views. For similar materials see Interpersonal Communication in Communication Studies at University of Miami.

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Date Created: 12/09/15
COS 112 Test 3 Chapter 9: Relationships with Romantic Partners defining a romantic relationship  liking = a feeling of affection and respect that we typically have for our friends o affection = sense of warmth and fondness toward another person o respect = admiration for someone apart from how they treat/communicate with you  loving = a deeper more intense emotional experience consisting of 3 components: intimacy, caring, and attachment o (1) intimacy = feelings of closeness and union o (2) caring = concern you have for their welfare/ desire to keep them happy o (3) attachment = longing to be in your partners presence as much as possible  ideal combination for long term success = both like and love each other  types of romantic love: o (1) passionate love = state of intense emotional and physical longing for union with another  (a) view loved ones in idealistic light  (b) people feel it from all cultures  (c) no age or gender differences  (d) sexuality & desire  (e) negatively related to relationship duration o (2) companionate love = an intense form of liking defined by emotional investment and deeply intertwined  lives  gender differences: women score higher on pragma but men are more likely than women to perceive romantic  partners as perfect and believe in love at first sight  romantic types of love: o storge = friendly love (stable, predictable, rooted in friendship) o agape = forgiving love (patient, selfless, giving) o mania = obsessive love (intense, extreme, all consuming) o pragma = practical love (logical, rational, and founded in common sense) o ludus = game playing love (fun, game, uncommitted) o eros = romantic love  (sentimental, romantic, idealistic)  key elements of romantic relationships: o romantic relationship = a chosen interpersonal involvement forged through communication in which the  participants perceive the bond as romantic o 6 elements:  (1) perception (that there is a relationship_  (2) diversity (all  ages genders)  (3) choice (choose)  (4) commitment = strong psychological attachment to a partner and an intention to continue the  relationship long into the future  wrong stereotype that men are commitment phobic  men place high value on it and score higher than women on measures of commitment in  college  (5) tensions  relational dialectics = impulses, tensions, between our selves and feeligns toward others o 3 common forms:  (a) Oppenness v. Protection  too much openness provokes an uncomfortable sense that we’ve  lost our privacy and must share everything with lovers  (b) Autonomy v. Connection  (c) novelty v. predictability   romance more successful when partners behave in predictable ways that reduce uncertainty  (6) communication romantic attraction  (1) Proximity = being in presence frequently o Mere Exposure Effect = you’ll feel more attracted to those whom  you interact frequently and less to whom  you interact rarely  (2) Physical Attractiveness = attracted to attractive people o Beautiful Is good effect = view beautiful people as competent communicators o matching = we tend to form long term relationships with people we judge as similar to ourselves in physical  attractiveness  (3) Similarity = similar to ourselves o birds of a feather effect  (4) Reciprocal liking = attraction is mutual o most commonly mentioned factor leading to love  (5) Resources = the person offers o Social Exchange Theory = you feel drawn to those you see as offering substantial benefits with few  associated costs  two factors whether you find someone initially attractive:  you perceive them as offering rewards you deserve  you think rewards they offer are superior to those you can get elsewhere o Equity = the balance of benefits to costs exchanged by you and partner  det. whether relationship will take root  (6) Technology & Romantic Attraction relationship development and deterioration coming together stages = initiating, experimenting, intensifying, integrating, and bonding  (1) Initiating = you draw on available visual info to determine whether you find them attractive o primary concern is to portray yourself in a positive light  (2) experimenting = demographic information and small talk o pleasant and light, casual dating, most involvements never progress beyond this stage  (3) intensifying = increasingly intimate o reveal withheld information o informal forms of address like honey o direct expression of commitment: I think I’m falling for you  (4) integrating = you and your partner’s personalities seem to become one o reinforced through sexual activity and exchange of belongings o use of “our”; connectedness versus autonomy struggle  (5) bonding = a public ritual that announces to the world that you and your partner have made a commitment to one  another; marriage; institutionalizes relationship coming apart stages = differentiating, circumscribing, stagnating, avoiding, terminating  (1) differentiating = the beliefs, attitudes, and values that distinguish you from your partner come to dominate your  thoughts and communication; most healthy relationships dabble here  (2) circumscribing = respond to problematic differences by ignoring them and spending less time talking o create safe zones and only discus topics that wont provoke conflict  (3) stagnating = almost no safe zone topics left and communication is a standstill  (4) avoiding = decide you no longer can be around each other o distance yourself physically; indirectly or directly like fb status single  (5) terminating = sense of closure and resolution o lack of intimacy communicated, discuss relationship and future maintaining romantic relationships maintenance strategies  relational maintenance = refers to using communication and supportive behaviors to sustain a desired relationship  status and level of satisfaction  (1) positivity = communicating in a cheerful and optimistic way, favors, gifts o in all rel, cited as most important maintenance tactic  (2) assurances = 2  most powerful, msgs that emphasize how much a partner means to you o I love you o talk about future and say to your partner you’re devoted  (3) sharing tasks = the most frequently practiced form of maintenance o taking mutual responsibility for chores, try to pitch equally  (4) acceptance = be supportive and forgiving and communicating affirmation and support o forgive partner when he makes mistakes  (5) self­disclosure = create a climate of security and trust within your relationship o share thoughts, feelings, fears  (6) relationship talks = making time to discuss your relationship and really listen o set aside time to chat   (7) social network = involve yourself with your partner’s friends and family o romances are more likely to survive if important members of the couple’s social networks approve  o tell your partner you like his family, invite his family to share activities, turn to families of both for help and  advice when needed maintaining romance distance  found to be more satisfying and stable than those that are geographically close o score higher on measures of love, positivity, agreement, and overall communication quality o why:   constrain communication to positive  idealize partners more  deciding whether to maintain o 4 factors: 1. degree to which partners consider themselves in love, 2. balance of equity is equal, 3. similarity,  4. network support the dark side of romantic relationships  (1) romantic betrayal = an act that goes against expectations of a relationship & causes pain to a partner o intentional o evokes 2 intense reactions: 1. overwhelming sense of relational devaluation; 2. profound sense of loss o (a) sexual infidelity = engaging in sexual activity with someone else; the most destructive form of romantic  betrayal o (b) emotional infidelity = engaging in sexual activity with someone else  men found sex more upsetting, women emotional attachment.  rd o (c) deception = intentional manipulation of information; most find out through 3  party. o (d) disloyalty = hurting your partner to benefit yourself  (2) jealousy = a protective reaction to a perceived threat to a valued relationship o combo of anger, fear, sickness o facebook jealousy o wedging = a person deliberately uses messages, photos, and posts to try and wedge themselves in between  partners in a romantic couple b/c they’re interested in one of the partners  (3) relational intrusion = the violation of one’s independence and privacy by a person who desires an intimate  relationship o 2 forms common:  1. monitoring and controlling = constantly texting   2. invasion of privacy = nosing or snooping o symptomatic of a person’s inability to let go on ended rels.  (4) dating violence = let go of belief, leave, safety. Chapter 10: Relationships with Family Members defining family  family = network of people who share their lives over long periods of time and are bounded by marriage, blood, or  commitment; who consider themselves as family; and who share a significant history and anticipated future of  functioning in a family relationship  (1) possess a sense of family in how they communicate  (2) use communication to define boundaries, both inside family and to distant family members from outsiders  (3) emotional bonders underlay family relationships are intense and complex  (4) share a history  (5) may share genetic material  (6) constantly juggle multiple and sometimes competing roles types of families  (1) nuclear family = wife husband and child, most common 60 years ago  (2) extended family = relatives such as uncles, grandparents, aunts live together in a common household  (3) stepfamily – at lest one of the adults has a child from a previous relationship  (4) cohabiting couples = consists of two unmarried, romantically involved adults living together in a household with  or without children; increase in western society  (5) single­parent family = only one adult resides in the household, possessing sole responsibility as caregiver for the children  communicating in families  Family Communication Patterns Theory = says two dimensions underlie the communication between family  members o (1) Conversation Orientation = the degree to which family members are encourages to participate in  unrestrained interaction about a wide array of topics  high conversation orientation = encouraged to participate in unrestrained interaction about a wide  array of topics  low conversation orientation = view ic as irrelevant o (2) Conformity Orientation = the degree to which families believe that communication should emphasize  similarity or diversity in beliefs, attitudes, and values  high conformity family = highlight uniformity  low conformity family = emphasize diversity and encourage independence     Family Communication Patterns o (1) Consensual Families = high in both conversation and conformity  speak openly, high disclosure, attentive listening, frequent support o (2) Pluralistic Families = high conversation, low conformity   communicate in open unconstrained ways and enjoy debating; don’t try and control other family  members beliefs o (3) Protective Families = low conversion, high conformity  communication functions to maintain obedience and enforce family values  little value on exch. of ideas  o (4) Laissez­Faire families = low, low  few emotional bonds exist between their members, low levels of care and support expressed. maintaining family relationships     Maintenance Strategies for Families o (1) positivity = most powerful o (2) assurances  o (3) self­disclosure = sharing private thoughts  biggest advantage of technology is that it lets you get in touch with family members at any time  family dialect o relational dialects = tensions exist between competing impulses o (1) autonomy v. connection  hard to manage during adolescence  2 maintenance techniques  for sharing tasks, you want to balance your dependence on family members to help you carry out everyday chores with a reliance on yourself and people outside your family  examine your social networks and assess the degree to which family members constitute the  closest people in your life o (2) openness v. protection  Communication Privacy Management theory = individuals create informational boundaries by  carefully choosing the kind of private information they reveal and the people with whom they share it  Family Privacy Rules = the conditions governing what family members can talk about, how they can  discuss such topics, and who should have access to family­relevant information family challenges  Stepfamily Transition o Triangulation = most common, loyalty conflicts that arise when a coalition is formed, uniting one family  member with another against a third person  children been caught and stepparents feel caught o suggest: slow but early, practice daily maintenance, create new family rituals, avoid triangulating family  members, be patient with a lengthy adjustment  Parental favoritism = where one or both parents allocate unfair amounts of value resources to one   Interparental Conflict = overt hostile interactions betweens parents in a household o most devastating effect relational o interparental conflict is associated with children’s social problems, including lower levels of play with peers  and lower friendship quality  also more at risk for aggressive and delinquent behaviors o adolescents who perceive a high frequency of IP conflict are more likely to report feeligns of jealousy and  fears of abandonment in their romantic relationship o Spillover Hypothesis = emotions, affect, & moods from parental relationships spill over into the broader  family disrupting children’s sense of emotional security  exp chronic sense of instability


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