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This 8 page Class Notes was uploaded by Bianca Dukesherer on Friday February 6, 2015. The Class Notes belongs to HD 204 at Washington State University taught by ViviAnne Fischer in Fall. Since its upload, it has received 139 views. For similar materials see Family Systems and Interactions in Human Development at Washington State University.
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Date Created: 02/06/15
HD 205 Exam 2 Study Guide How communication creates intimacv Confirmation imply an acceptance of the other 1 Acknowledges the other person s existence Recognition 2 Affirms the other s communication by responding relevantly Dialogue 3 Reflects and accepts the other s selfexperience Acceptance 4 Suggests a willingness to become involved with the other Rituals Disclosure selfdisclosure Revealing information about oneself involves taking a risk Trust in partner is foundation of selfdisclosure Results in intimacy when partner responds with validation understanding and empathy Breadth superficial information shared with many people and early in the relationship Depth significant information shared with few people and later in the relationship Parents more likely to receive self disclosure mothers nurturing partner When is it likely to occur Debriefing conversations developmental or unpredictable stresses Sexual Communication Intimacy and sex in partner relationships Sex is both a form of communication and a reflexion of communication Sexuality and behavior reflect gender socialization Sexua scripts expectations for how to behave sexually Who what when where why Sexual lens everyone s different interpretations Communication in the bedroom starts in other rooms Ability to talk about sexual relationship linked to satisfaction Commitment degree to which we are willing to work for the continuation of the relationship Internally amp externally imposed constraints Personal dedication ought to amp have to stay together Relationship turning points direct efforts where is this going talk and indirect efforts secret tests Forgiveness involves Acknowledging other person s actions were harmful Transforming psychological state negative to positive Offering reconciliation Regenerating relationship Obligatory nature of family relationships motivates us to forgive Some transgressions are too damaging to forgive Parentchild communication about sex Mothers discuss sex more with children especially with daughters Girls who talk with moms about sex More likely to have conservative sexual values less likely to have engaged in sexual activity more likely to use condoms consistently Some parents don t discuss sex even when teens want to discuss it Why Some parents want to discuss sex with their children but don t knOW how to generation maybe never did talk about it Not talking about sex still sends a message its okay with them if you do Fear of intimacy lnhibiting Factors Merger Exposure Attack Abandonment Jealousy perception that valued relationship is threatened Results in distancing negativity avoidance violence Couples Siblings Deception intentionally withholding information or communicating false information Violates expectations of commitment Loss of trust Leads to marital dissatisfaction RelationalMarital Maintenance Relational Maintenance everyday stuff that involves keeping a relationship Strategies Positivity openness assurances social networks sharing tasks Effort putting time and energy into the relationship Gottmans Love Maps ability to know your partner Favoriteleast favorite relatives Current worriesconcerns Best Friends Most stressful childhood event Dreams and aspirations Sacrifice setting aside selfinterest Ex relocating for partner s career Working extra shifts while partner goes back to school 39 Quitting smoking Forgiveness acknowledging other person s actions were harmful Offering reconciliation regenerating relationship Gottman s Magic Ratio 39The ratio of positive to negative interactions needs to be 51 In times of conflict 5 positive interactions to 1 negative one Ex active listening active acknowledgment 391 most successful using humor during a fight Family Rituals Repeated behaviors or events that involve Symbolism tokens words phrases images Emotion weddings funeral tradition Transformation one state to another leaving home for college Preparation wedding thanksgiving etc build up to an occasion Serve ongoing maintenance amp relational functions in the family Development As part of cultural traditions Families develop create or invent new ones Across the family life cycle Formative Childrearing Launching PostChildrearing Interdenerational Rituals GrandparentGrandchild rituals ParentChild rituals Blended family Managing Rituals Underutilization Overutilization Distinctiveness Balance in stability and change Relational Currencies Communication behaviors that carry meaning about the affection or caring dimension of human relationships Ways of showing caring love and kindness Symbolic exchange process Family of origin influence How we feel loved etc Types of currencies Positive verbal statements Touch Aggression Sexuality Money Food Satisfaction is tied to one s perception of currency Couples with similar affection exchange behaviors have higher levels of relationship satisfaction Emotional Bank Account Gottman Either turn toward each other or away How do you earn points in a relationship Be mindful of the automatic pilot Understand what your partner wants partner can often feel like heshe is a burden and will hide what heshe needs or wants so it remains unclear Bids the way a person expresses what they need in that moment Ex a hug asking opinion etc Negative Bids Ask what you want in a negative way lt s usually the first time the significant other will even hear about it Prevent this social and emotional support ask the others opinion Responding Turning toward noticing amp responding Turning away not mindful Turning against Refuse bid Family Roles Role attachment tendency to become caught up in the identity a role provides us Roe relinquishment process of giving up a role when circumstances change Models Roe enactment The behaviors and interactions that characterize the tole you are playing Influenced by 39Complementary others 39Our other roles Conflict stress resulting from incongruity between own or others role expectations and role performance Stress resulting from incompatible roles Negotiation Ongoing process of constructing and modifying how we enact our roles lnvolves conversations with those in related roles 39Functions 39Providing gender socialization Meeting adult sexual needs Providing nurturance and emotional support Providing for individual development Providing basic resources Providing kinship maintenance and family management Couple Typologies Fitzpatrick m What is power Power is property of a relationship not an individual Power develops through a transactional process Power dynamics have systemwide effects Power Bases Sources of power Resources Normative normativecultural expectations of family roles ex wife not able to eat until men at the table ate everything they wanted first Economic money control Whoever makes more money controls the budget etc tends to have more power Affective nurturer of the family able to make others feel needed loved etc is the power Persona Charm looks humor competence is their power Cognitive Awareness in how you use power can logically see how to use It Perception of resourceinterest in resource is important Power Processes family communication practices that affect family discussions arguments decision making and especially crisis situations Messages in a family are cocreated as a power process by the senders and receivers Power Outcomes 39Who makes decisions and who wins 39lncludes decisions solutions new rules or procedures emotional effects and feelings about the decisions 39Power bases influences this 39Patterns in Marriage 39Marital power reflects the extent to which one spouse loves and needs the other 39Marital power is often measured by looking at spouses dependent love for one another based on the belief that the spouse with the strongest emotional involvement in the relationship is the less powerful Children s power in families Children need to be included in family discussions because they impact the family interaction Their words and behaviors affect the development of family rules Sometimes they influence the interaction and outcomes of power struggles by using power plays like screaming or interruptions 39They also become adept at power playing one parent against the other ex Daddy said I could do it Blended families often contend with issues of power and authority ex She can t tell me what to do she s not my real mom Power amp Communication strategies 39Confirming acknowledgment and may be used gain power when one tries to get another to identify with himher or giving rewards in order to gain power 39Disconfirming Silent treatment is an example One puts the other in a one down power position with the punishment strategy 39Rejecting tie directly to punishment messages and are often used as control in family power plays lnfuence Occurs when family members use their power to try to change or modify each other s behavior or beliefs Persuasion and control Direct influence strategies include bargaining reasoning and asking lndirect include hinting and withdrawal Patterned decision processes Decisions process through which families make choices and develop solutions 39Usually involves sub groups rather than the whole family Often highlightsaddresses differences between members lnstrumental the daily workings of family ex how to meet developmental or material needs Affective related to feelingsemotions ex resolving conflict or making choices that involve values or feelings Types and styles of decision making Consensus discussing until everyone reaches agreement Accommodation some members give in and give the other person more of the power ex votes De Facto isn t family approval one member makes the decisions Styles Zerosum decisions driven by self interest requires coercive power or punishment info not valued only goal is to win aways oneup relationship Works only if winslosses are balanced Decisions via rules 3 types of rules used in family decision making 1 Rules for dividing resources 2 Rules of designated authority 3 Rules of negotiation Decisions based on principle fairness and concern for others is a principle requires empathy and cooperation works when children have been taught to value rights strengths limitations of others etc Phases in decision making 1 Identify Clarify problem identify problem articulate a goal and assess resources 2 Alternatives generate and assess alternatives 3 Building Consensus select best alternative 4 Putting the decision into action accept a decision make a plan of action evaluate the action and problem solving process Factors affecting decision making 39Role of children and adolescents Depends on moods developmental appropriateness 39Gender may impact the domain of influence depends on employment men in positions that allow autonomy selfdirection group problemsolving Women who work have more influence Outside influences institutions policies agencies 39lndividual investment some members may not be concerned about result agenda setting How families practice good decision making 39Communication skills problem solving and negotiation Allowing speaking Avoiding negative messages Seeking multiple options 39Communicating clearly
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