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This 5 page Class Notes was uploaded by Alex Craig on Wednesday February 11, 2015. The Class Notes belongs to a course at University of Pittsburgh taught by a professor in Fall. Since its upload, it has received 36 views.
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Date Created: 02/11/15
Craig 1 Alex Craig Eleni Anastasiou Seminar in Composition 102314 Self Evaluation So far the two essays we have written were two very different writing experiences to me Percy caught my attention with a subject I have contemplated and discussed before and filled in some of the gaps I hadn t quite worked out myself As I wrote the discussion notes and questions I was able to begin forming an idea of what my essay would look like My first draft made a couple points that I wanted to make and the topic wasn t too bad for the most part In my revision my main goal was to narrow my topic and eliminate irrelevant discussion and dead sentences I also tried to look at the concept of symbolic complex in the bigger picture instead of the specific examples that I gave I eliminated about a paragraph of selfindulgence where I talked about my show history and love of the band Phish instead further elaborating on the symbolic complex the band presents I misstated my point in my parallel example of the complex of the outdoors and re wrote that portion I expanded upon my example of Brave New World and discussed it instead of just mentioning it Upon proofreading my paper I corrected many small grammatical mistakes especially misuse of punctuation Every sentence was connected to the main topic to the best of my ability I also tried to more thoroughly analyze quotes and transition into them better Finally I realized my essay was long enough that I could cut out the portion revolving around educational packing so that my top was strictly that of loss of sovereignty relevant to symbolic complex Craig 2 Upon Rereading the criteria and my paper I realized I had not only completely missed the point of Bordo s essay but also did not accomplish anything from the criteria I was supposed to My Percy revisions didn t take long and were basically just revisions but I quickly came to the realization my Bordo essay was going to need much more than that so I simply restarted the paper with a blank word document and worked from there I tried to begin by brie y stating my subject position and then move into a segment the discusses the fashion of the 14th century and 18th century so that I can refer back to them and reference similarities whenever I compared modern fashion to the fashion of the period which Bordo wrote her essay After this I transitioned to marketing and then to the analysis of advertisements I tried to include subject position into my ad analysis as well as reading as far into the purpose of the ad as I could I completed my essay with a conclusion in which I did my best to tie together my entire essay and use that as a basis to explain the relationship between society and fashion I realized upon completing my essay that it was over the supposed 6 page limit so I began trying to cut things out I determined after rereading the essay several times that I could not take anything but a couples sentences out here and there without having to take out large portions of my essay that would result in one of my major points being lost After brainstorming how I could condense and rework it I concluded that I was mostly satisfied with my essay as it was and would rather leave it too long then not include any of the points which I was trying to make Overall I am slightly disappointed in my performance in this class so far this semester I used to think that I was a competent writer until I took this course but now realize that is not quite the case I enjoy writing from a creative standpoint and I enjoy persuasive essays or research papers which are pretty similar at times actually on a topic which I am interested in Craig 3 but this sort of in depth analytical writing is something that I do not enjoy as much or have experience with Many of the homeworks we have done I struggled with figuring out what I was supposed to be saying with Bordo Class participation is another low point for me I will actively listen to the discussion and try to think of things to say but rarely does anything come to mind Sometimes I will have something I d like to say and then not raise my hand because I m worried it s a poor point to make only to hear someone else or you say exactly what I was going to say shortly thereafter Other times I will have an idea or point but cannot figure out how to explain it to the class without a long rant that would make me sound crazy Also I am not a morning person and being half asleep in class without more than a few hours sleep does not enhance my ability to participate in class discussions I am trying to make an effort to participate more and place more effort into this class in general treating it with more importance As far as my writing style goals I believe I am beginning to move towards where it is supposed to be but I still have trouble in some areas For example I have had trouble making my essays tell a story and have it ow from beginning to end with effective transitions from paragraph to paragraph Eliminating dead sentences is something I still need to work on also many times in my revisions I realize that a surprisingly large portion of my essay is completely irrelevant or I failed to connect it to my topic That is another thing I have had trouble working with narrowing my topic enough to write a specific to the point paper that is not way too long Finally I need to show more emotion and more of myself in my paper a few days ago a friend read one of my essays and said she would have never guessed I had written it since there was so little emotion in it Craig 4 I would like to develop into a writer like Henry Wallace who is able to make even the most boring topics somewhat interesting I would like to be enthusiastic interesting witty enthralling and precise It is important that I am able to effectively convey my point in a way that is easily interpretable by the general population In order to get here I need to make sure I have a thorough and comprehensive understanding of the topic that I am writing on as well as understanding the crowd I am writing for To incorporate enthusiasm into my writing I need to develop a passion to some extent for whatever my topic may be Therefore my goals for the second semester are to eliminate uff writingdead sentences show passion and interest in my writing and direct the essay so that it ows naturally with crisp transitions Finally I will read assignments until I can competently understand the reading before beginning to write so that there are no parts that I have to theorize and guess what the author is saying Craig 5
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