Topic 11: Anger Cognitive Coping
Topic 11: Anger Cognitive Coping PSY 311
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This 4 page Class Notes was uploaded by Alicia Rinaldi on Tuesday September 8, 2015. The Class Notes belongs to PSY 311 at University of Miami taught by Ray Winters in Spring 2015. Since its upload, it has received 32 views. For similar materials see Emotion in Psychlogy at University of Miami.
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Date Created: 09/08/15
Topic 11 Anger Cognitive Coping Situations that Require Cognitive Coping When active coping cannot be used 0 Abandoned wives o Unexpected intruders o Reminder 0 active coping managing or correcting the distressing situation itself problemfocused coping breaking a romantic attachment changing your major o cognitive copingreappraisal changing the personal meaning of the situation emotionfocused coping quotI didn t like him anyway H M he was selfcenteredquot Talking about Anger to a Friend 0 could be good or bad way to cope with anger 0 one myth is that talking about your anger to a friend will decrease your anger talking about the anger may lead to an increase in anger because it often leads to anger rehearsal where you rekindle angry feelings talking to a friend can be effective if cognitive changes occur ie cognitive reappraisal where you view the situation differently social vitamin vs anger rehearsal 0 social vitamin being friends and loved ones with those who provide emotional support and show that you are important even though you have been rejected or have failed at something 0 anger rehearsal talking about your problem may increase your emotional distress if there are no cognitive changes Negative emotions such as anger can be intensi ed by others because they are trying to quotbe on your sidequot They point to the injustice and increase your anger Does complaining venting to a friend help 0 Cognitive coping method 0 Not effective typically leads to anger rehearsal Helping a Friend Cope 0 Active listening try to accept the person s message without judging or leaping to conclusions Family systems theory 0 let person know you are listening through eye contact posture tone replies 0 clarify the problem try to understand the problem from the person s point of view 0 a problem well de ned is often half solved 0 you are not expected to solve the problem but to be a facilitator focus on feelings validation of feelings feelings are neither right nor wrong don t say quotdon t feel that wayquot focusing on feelings is a way to provide emotional support provide a safe uncritical environment feelings result from cognitive appraisal and cognitive reappraisal will often help people deal with issue passing judgment on what is said makes people defensive 0 ex a friend did poorly on a test but you know he rarely studies 0 if you tell him to study more he will become defensivehostile 0 better to say quotyou must feel frustratedhow do you feelquot 0 it s not necessary to give advice 0 remember your goal is to provide understanding and support not solutions 0 be a facilitator but be ware of the quotwhy don t you butquot trap o accept the person s frame of reference 0 looking to be understood amp for empathy not a solution 00000 H M yes when appropriate focus on a cognitive reappraisal of the circumstances that led to the emotional distress As an example ask what the worst thing that can happen is and then gure out how to handle that outcome Forgiveness o is not a pardon excuse for fault or offense denying or forgetting what happened conditioning quotit probably won t happen againquot cheap grace in which people don t have to be held accountable for their wrongdoing o reconciliation though it may lead to it you can forgive without a foolish trust in people who have proved O O O O untrustworthy you may never want to see the person again 0 means to quotlet goquot of past negative memories that are dictating current emotions 0 not letting go means that these memories play too big a part in your current emotional life 0 can mean forgiving others for things they have done to you 0 type of cognitive coping that allows a person to let go of anger resentment indignation and a sense of being entitled to revenge and retaliation people who use forgiveness vs seeking retaliatory justice 0 report ess depression hostility anger o more hopeful and experience higher selfesteem Bene ts of Sustaining Anger amp Resentment not forgiving secondary gains rewards gleaned from maladaptive behavior from not letting go o attention and sympathy of others from being victimized o righteous anger can be rewarding you can take satisfaction from the fact that someone did something wrong to feel superior to them selfrighteous lled withshowing conviction of being morally superior or more righteous than others smueg virtuous o righteous anger can be so rewarding for some people that it is a Bsubstitute for happiness Negative Consequences of Not Letting Go of Anger and Resentment 0 it s natural to feel angry want to strike back or to harm someone in return when they harm you 0 we become the servant of anger o emotional energy is shifted from those who matter to those we don t care about resentment quotto feel againquot we review redo and rehearse our pain again 0 become rigid and unyielding to the person who hurt us and to the world tenderness becomes hard judgment is clouded Retaliation as a Coping Technique 0 can be effective in some circumstances 0 ex seeing a person who almost crashed into your car get pulled over 0 ex seeing someone who quotstolequot your parking space get a ticket 0 people often use the legal system to exact retaliatory justice 0 O 0 do these coping methods work or is it a way to sustain anger Ex hurting someone by suing them getting more money custody of children custody of pets in divorce Execution parties parties the victim will have when the offender is put to death
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