INTERPERSONAL COMM SPCM 1500
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This 12 page Class Notes was uploaded by Jillian Graham on Saturday September 12, 2015. The Class Notes belongs to SPCM 1500 at University of Georgia taught by Tina Harris in Fall. Since its upload, it has received 30 views. For similar materials see /class/202372/spcm-1500-university-of-georgia in Speech & Communication at University of Georgia.
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Date Created: 09/12/15
III Stages of Deterioration or Coming Apart Avoiding D Avoiding With stagnating the people are in the same physical surroundings With avoiding people literally are apart from one another 3 kinds of distancing 1 Avoidance preventing an interaction from taking place 2 Disengagement hiding information about oneself 3 Cognitive dissociation disregarding messages derogating the other showing cognitive and emotional detachment httpwwwvoutubecomwatchvqueVJv6I7c E Terminating It is the end at least temporarily of a relationship 1 Can happen anytime eg after 5 minutes or 40 years 2 Can occur as a result of a single event or an accumulation of events httpwwwyoutubecomwatchvW8 quOx Y SPCM 1500 Exam Study Guide Nonverbal communication All behaviors other than spoken words that communicate messages and create shared meaning between people 4 principles of nonverbal communication 1 2 3 Nonverbal communication is often ambiguous a Our nonverbal messages mean different things to different people b Many factors influence meaning of nonverbal behaviors shared fields of experience current surroundings culture etc Nonverbal communication regulates conversation 3 Allow speakers to enter exit or maintain the conversation b Turntaking who talks when and to whom Nonverbal communication is more believable than verbal communication a People believe nonverbal messages over verbal messages 4 Nonverbal communication may conflict with verbal communication a Mixed message when our nonverbal messages are not congruent with our verbal messages b Children rely on the words of a message more than the nonverbal behaviors Nonverbal codes Kinesics the study of a person s body movement and its effect on the communication process primary components are gestures and body postureorientation delivery gestures signal shared understanding between communicators citing gestures acknowledge another s feedback seeking gestures request agreement or clarification from the speaker turn gestures indicate when another person can speak or are used to request the conversation floor posture is generally a result of how tense or relaxed we are body orientation affects conversations Physical appearance play a role in our evaluations of others encompasses all of the physical characteristics of an individual including body size skin color hair color and style facial hair and facial features skin color has affected communication process body size can influence our interpersonal relationship body artifacts also have the potential to communicate the attractiveness of the communicators each culture has its own ideal of physical beauty its own interpretation of what is attractive people seek out others who are similar to themselves in attractiveness physically attractive people are often judged to be more friendly and intelligent Facial expressions the face gives others some insight into how someone is feeling cover the gamut of emotional meaning usually don t have much control over our facial communication eye has the most potential for communication eye contact is a complex part of human behavior look directly into someone s eyes to communicate interest power or anger roll our eyes to signal disbelief or disapproval avoid eye contact when we are uninterested nervous or shy smiling is one of the most recognizable nonverbal behaviors worldwide Paralanguage the study of a person s voice vocalics refers not to what a person is saying but how a person is saying it vast array of nonverbal behaviors such as pitch rate volume inflection tempo and pronunciation vocal qualities vocal segregates which are the quotumsquot and quotersquot ofa conversation nonverbal behaviors such as crying laughing groaning muttering whispering and whining vocal characterizers person s use of his or her voice includes the decision whether or not to use it silence indicates that we need some time for reflection silence gives us a chance to think about the circumstances of events surrounding an interpersonal relationship silence serves as a weapon Haptics the study of how we communicate through touch touching a person invades personal space ambiguous form of communication because touching has various meanings depending on the context takes different forms and signals multiple messages positive affect which includes support appreciation inclusion and affection playful function that serves to lighten an interaction used to control or to direct behavior in an encounter ritualistic touch refers to the touches we use on an everyday basis task function pertains to touch that serves a professional or functional purpose hybrid touch greets a person and simultaneously demonstrates affection of that person accidental touch is done without apparent intent Space proxemics is the study of distance personal space is the distance we put between ourselves and others and provides some insight into ourselves and how we feel about other people sometimes decisions about spatial communication are made for us territoriality is our sense of ownership of space that remains fixed territorial markers are how humans mark their territory Types of distance intimate distance covers that distance that extends for you to around 18 inches and is reserved for those with whom you are close personal distance ranging from 18 inches to 4 feet is the space most people use during conversations social distance which is four to twelve feet is the spatial zone usually reserved for professional or formal interpersonal encounters public distance occurs at a distance of twelve or more feet allows listeners to scan the entire person while he or she is speaking Expectancy violations theory We expect certain behaviors based on the other communicator the relationship the context Violations are distracting and confusing so we try to explain them Physical environment The setting in which our behavior takes place how we utilize the parts of the environment how we manage them and their influence upon us all are part of nonverbal communication includes a number of features including the smell clutter and sounds of our surroundings lighting of the environment can modify behavior Chronemics time systems The study of a person s use of time describe using figures of speech use of time in order to communicate technical time scientific measurement of time formal time the time that society formally teaches informal time time that includes three concepts duration punctuality and activity Culture and nonverbal Body movement greetings vary from one culture to another gesturing has also been studied across cultures the way the concept of quottwoquot is communicated o Facial expressions eye contact the extent to which a person looks at another during a conversation is culturally based 0 Personal space special distances have been the focus of research in intercultural communication interpretations of personal space vary from culture to culture people from individualistic cultures require more space than do those from collectivist cultures personal space requirements of people from collectivist cultures can be partially explained by the fact that people from these cultures llwork play live and sleep in close proximity to one another 0 Touch some cultures accept more samesex touching than others nonverbal behaviors should always be understood within a cultural context cannot assume that others automatically understand our nonverbal displays because their meanings can differ significantly within and across cultures Nonverbal effectiveness 0 Recall the nonverbalverbal relationship need to pay attention to what is said in addition to the nonverbal behavior blend nonverbal and verbal messages prepared for incongruity between nonverbal and verbal behavior 0 Be tentative when interpreting nonverbal behavior never be sure what a specific nonverbal behavior means consider the cultural background of communicators be aware of your own biases because they may not reflect the views of another 0 Monitor your nonverbal behavior how you say something your proximity to the other person the extent to which you use touch use of silence are just as important as the words used look for meaning in both your behavior and the behavior of another 0 Ask others for their impressions ask others as we decide whether or not we re achieving meaning in our interpersonal relationships 0 Place nonverbal communication in context society that embraces simplistic notions associated with nonverbal communication need to avoid superficial ideas about our nonverbal communication pay attention to nonverbal cues but place them in appropriate context to acquire meaning must consider the entire communication process not just one element of it Hearing the physical process of letting in audible stimuli without focusing on the stimuli the physical process of receiving audio stimuli but not necessarily interpreting the stimuli Listening the dynamic transactional process of receiving recalling rating and responding to stimuli messages or both from another a dynamic and transactional process of receiving recalling rating and responding to stimuli Listening process 0 Receiving involves the verbal and nonverbal acknowledgement of communication attention spans are short lasting around two to twenty seconds 0 Recalling involves understanding a message storing it for future encounters and remembering it later immediate shortterm or longterm people s recall abilities vary repeating information causes the exact wording to be remembered later and clarifies confusing terms use mnemonic devices visualize items as you listen to them chunk information chunking means placing pieces of information into manageable and retrievable sets Rating evaluating or assessing a message decide whether or not to agree with the message and we often place the message in context facts are verifiable and can be made only after direct observation inferences are a conversation s llmissing pieces and require listeners to go beyond what was observed opinions can undergo changes over time and are based on a communicator s beliefs or values Responding providing observable feedback to a sender s message provide both nonverbal and verbal feedback to someone as he or she talks and at times our feedback continues even though the conversation has ended good listeners provide feedback while maintaining frequent eye contact displaying an open body position and paraphrasing or restating relevant statements Poor listeners jumped to conclusions talked only about themselves displayed a closed body position and interrupted Barriers to listening Noise physical environment can affect our listening skills anything that interferes with the message physical distractions can take place anywhere Message overload the result when senders receive more messages than they can process multitasking is the simultaneous performance of two or more tasks Message complexity messages we receive that are filled with details unfamiliar language and challenging arguments are often hard to understand Lack of training few schools offer courses on listening only a few companies offer training in listening Preoccupation conversational narcissism is engaging in an extreme amount of selffocusing during a conversation to the exclusion of another person those who are narcissistic are caught up in their own thoughts and are inclined to interrupt others Listening gap the time difference between your mental ability to interpret words and the speed at which they arrive to your brain we can think about three or four times faster than we can talk 4 styles of listening Peoplecentered a listening style associated with concern for other s people feelings or emotions try to compromise and find common areas of interest people listeners are less apprehensive in groups meetings and interpersonal situations that other types of listeners quickly notice others moods and provide clear verbal and nonverbal feedback Actioncentered a listening style associated with listeners who want messages to be highly organized concise and errorfree help speakers focus on what is important in the message want speakers to get to the point grow impatient when people tell stories in a disorganized or random fashion also secondguess speakers which means questioning the assumptions underlying a message clearly tell others that they want unambiguous feedback Contentcentered a listening style associated with listeners who focus on the facts and details of a message consider all sides of an issue and welcome complex and challenging information from a sender contentcentered listeners are likely able to play devil s advocate in conversations o Timecentered a listening style associated with listeners who want messages to be presented I I conversations such as prefacing a conversation with quotI have only 5 minutes to talkquot you may 0 wordy from speakers and set time guidelines for have to change your listening style to meet the other person s needs our listening style is often based on our cultural background Culture and listening 0 Because all our interactions are culturally based cultural differences affect the listening process while listening to others communicators need to remember that differences in feedback direct or indirect may affect message meaning cultures vary in their value systems and patterns of communication staying culturally aware of these variations as you consider the message of another person is important 0 Individualistic cultures value direct communication or speaking one s mind 0 Collectivist cultures value harmony and believe in conversational politeness Choices for effective listening 0 Evaluate your current skills assigning and understanding your personal listening strengths and weaknesses stresses and personal problems that may affect our listening skills 0 Prepare to listen preparation requires both physical and mental activities 0 Provide empathic responses when we use empathy we are telling other people that we value their thought empathy is the process of identifying with or attempting to experience the thoughts beliefs and actions or another show we re responsive and empathetic by giving well timed verbal feedback throughout a conversation not simply when it s our turn to speak 0 Use nonjudgmental feedback feedback that describes another s behavior and then explains how that behavior made us feel provide feedback without any concern for how the receiver will interpret it owning your feelings rather than blaming others for your feelings results in more effective interpersonal communication Active listening 4 strategies 0 Transactional process in which a listener communicated reinforcing messages to a speaker o Paraphrasing restating the essence of another s in our own words perception check in an interpersonal encounter allows us to clarify out interpretation of a message 0 Dialogue enhancers supporting expressions such as seequot or llI m listening active listening requires us to show the speaker that even though we may disagree with his or her thoughts we accept and are open to share should not interrupt a message should be used as indications that you are involved in the message 0 Silence should honor science when another person is struggling with what to say we need to allow the entire message to be revealed before jumping in silence can also be used to manipulate or coerce another person in an interpersonal exchange Emotion vs feeling 1 Both sensations experienced by humans 2 Feelings are triggered by external stimuli whereas emotions come from your mind and possibly soul eg internal stimuli 3 Feelings can include physical sensations as well as mental states but emotions always come from your mind 4 Feelings are temporary and subside once the stimulus is no longer present emotions will stay with you for years because they are seating in your mind Valence an attribute of emotion that refers to whether the emotion reflects a positive or negative feeling Intensity emphasis how much you are feeling the emotion refers to how strongly the individual feels the emotion Activity Realism Biology of emotions o Emotion is mainly related to instinct o Emotions are similar across many cultures 0 Emotion exists separately from thought and we need though to bring quotpreexistingquot emotion 0 Biology effects emotional expression I Smiling for example is not taught to us Social interaction theory of emotions o Recognizes that biology effects emotion o Focuses on how people interact in a social context before during and after they experience emotion Emotional contagion o the process of transferring emotions from one person to another 0 When our interpersonal communications are influenced by the emotions of those around us 0 The emotions of others are sometimes said to quotinfectquot those around them 0 Our feelings about ourselves and others are the critical internal structure that orients us to and engages us with what matters in our lives 0 Internal feelings ofone person and feelings that can be experienced only in a relationship 0 Mixed emotions or emotional blends Emotional experience the feeling of emotion feeling andor experiencing the emotion Emotional communication talking about an emotional experience talking about the experience of emotion with someone else Communicating emotionally communicating such that the emotion is not the content of the message but rather a property of it emotion is not the content on the message but a property of it Nonverbal cues verbal cues and emotions o Nonverbal cues o Facial expressions such as smiling o Paralanguage or tone of voice 0 Verbal cues o Sarcasms o Rhetorical questions Metaemotion emotion felt about experiencing another emotion talking about how we feel about expressing our emotions Culture and emotion o Cultures amp thinking about emotion o Cultures have different rules about how we express amp think about emotion 0 Be mindful of how emotion is communicated across cultures 0 Thinking about emotion o Cultures differ in how much they think and talk about emotion o How Emotion is Communicated across Cultures 0 People of different cultures express emotion differently Emotion and gender stereotypes 0 Women more emotional more emotionally expressive and more attuned to the emotions of others 0 Emotional expression or lack of it defines the essence of femininity and masculinity Emotional expression and gender 0 Women smile more than men in social situations 0 Men and women also differ in nonverbal expressiveness or facial animation and the liveliness of gestures 0 Women are more expressive than men 0 Women are more accurate than men in telling others emotions based on nonverbal cues Context and emotions 0 Online communication 0 Potential to be more in control of emotions but also potential to not be 0 Historical period 0 Feeling rules norms people use to shape their emotional expressions amp reactions 5 emotional communication skills 0 Know your feelings o Recognize your emotion 0 Establish that you re stating an emotion 0 Identify why you are feeling the emotion o Analyze the Situation 0 Do you wish to share your emotion w others o Is the time appropriate for sharing 0 How should you approach the communication o Is there anything you can do to change the situation if needed 0 Own your feelings o Owning is the skill of verbally taking responsibility for your actions 0 Use messages to show you understand that you are responsible for your feelings I feel when you and I would like quot o Reframe when needed put the situation in a more productive light 0 Look at the situation as something positive as opposed to negative 0 Empathize your ability to put yourself in someone else s place so you can understand their POV Role relationships Close relationships 0 Close relationships are ongoing with a past present and future 0 Close relationships are characterized by 0 The partners psychological and emotional concerns their feelings of affection and conscious knowledge of one another 0 The culturalsocial expectations and demands on the partners 0 The partners communication practices that negotiate between their private and public contexts Relationships as cultural performances cognitive constructs and linguistic constructions PAGE 284 o Culturalperformances o Marriages and all relationships are cultural performances relationships consist of the ongoing processes between the partners exchanges include myriad communication practice as well as public discourses 0 Cognitive constructs 0 Key events that we expect in a relationship both narrow scripts and broad scripts 0 Basic level simply aware of each other and the fact that they are in a relationship with one another 0 Complex level communication between the partners becomes patterned can guess what the other will say partners perceive a past present and future together labeling the relationship 0 Linguisticconstructs o Influences our sense of close relationships figurative language helps us understand and shapes our understanding of relationships by comparing them to other phenomena Relational culture 0 Plays a role in how we communicate in close relationships and how we define them cocultures also affect communication in close relationships 3 types of relationships Systems theory 0 Relationships are compared to living systems with six important properties 0 Wholeness principle that states that we can t fully understand a system by simply picking it apart and understanding each of its parts in isolation from one another 0 Interdependence a necessary condition for conflict given that people involved in conflict rely on each other need each other and are in a relationship with each other 0 Hierarchy a principle that states that all relationships are embedded within larger systems I Subsystems lowerlevel systems of relationship such as a sibling relationship within a family I Suprasystems higherlevel systems of relationship such as a neighborhood consisting of several families 0 Boundaries or openness refers to the fact that hierarchy is formed by creating boundaries around each separate system 0 Calibration or feedback the process of systems setting their parameters checking on themselves and selfcorrecting I Recalibrated adjust a relationship to accommodate changing needs of the parties I Positive feedback feedback that causes a system to recalibrate and change I Negative feedback feedback that causes a system to system to reject recalibration and stay the same 0 Equifinality ability to achieve the same goals or ends by a variety of means Social exchange theory 0 Point us more directly toward testable predictions about the topic 0 Assumptions of social exchange 0 Costs those things in relational life that we judge as negative 0 Rewards those parts of being in a relationship that we find pleasurable 0 Theory of interdependence 0 Comparison level a person s standard level for what types of costs and rewards should exist in a given relationship 0 Comparison level for alternatives a comparison of the costs and rewards of a current relationship to the possibility of doing better in a different relationship Dialectics theory 0 Focuses on the tensions that relational partners feel as a result of desiring both opposing poles of a contradiction rejects eitheror approaches in favor of bothans 0 Common relational dialectics o Autonomy and connection the tension between our desire to be independent or autonomous while simultaneously wanting to feel a connection with our partner 0 Openness and protection our desire for selfdisclosures which make us transparent to another and our desire for withholding disclosures which keeps us safe from another s disapproval 0 Novelty and predictability our simultaneous opposing desires for excitement and stability in our relationship 0 Found in friendships 0 Judgment and acceptance our desire to criticize a friend as opposed to accepting a friend for who he or she is o Affection and instrumentality the tension between framing a friendship with someone as an end in itself affection or seeing it as a means to another end instrumentality 0 Public and private the tension between how much ofa friendship is demonstrated in public and what parts are kept private 0 Ideal and real the tension between an idealized vision of friendship and the real friends one has 10 stages of relationship development Stages of Development or Coming Together A Initiating this is an initial interaction the first contact with another person 1 We consider our stereotypes the other s reputation previous interactions with them situational expectations 2 We determine whether the person is cleared for the encounter Is the person busy surrounded by others conversing with someone else in a relationship 3 We search for and choose an initiating line based on the kind of relationship whether they have B Experimenting This is a period of information seeking predicting anticipated outcomes of additional interactions and reducing uncertainty about the other 1 It is marked by a high degree of reciprocity in the exchange of information 2 The information exchanged is mostly cultural and sociological 3 This stage is a kind of initial testing period C Intensifying This is a period where the intimacy of the relationship whether psychological physical or both becomes greater 1 Attempts at increasing intimacy typically are very cautious 2 Deviation testing occurs 3 Communication behaviors include use of nicknames and terms of endearment use of first person plural private symbols begin to emerge verbal shortcuts occur communication becomes less necessary direct expressions of affect occur partner s express quothelpquot in daily understanding D Integrating Two individuals andor personalities fuse or combine into one entinty Interdependence develops 1 Attitudes opinions and tastes that differentiate the pair are emphasized llWe have something specialquot 2 Social networks merge and begin to treat the pair as one entity eg one invitation is sent one present given 3 Intimacy trophies are exchanged 4 Similarities are overtly accentuated verbally and nonverbally 5 Fusing combining or penetration of bodies may occur 6 Common property identified as simply as something purchased together or as large as joint bank account 7 Synchrony of routines occurs E Bonding A public ritual announcing formally contracted commitments llGoing steadyquot engagement cohabitation marriage are all examples of bonding rituals 2 Bonding can occur in nonintimate relationships eg contracts becoming roommates II Stages of Deterioration or Coming Apart A Differentiating this is literally becoming distinct 1 Begin using singular or possessive pronouns instead of plural ones 2 Often when circumscribing occurs quickly after bonding bonding occurred before the couple was ready for the step 3 Fighting arguing and conflict occur frequently in this stage B Circumscribing This is a process of constricting or limiting the relationship 1 Mostly this happens by limiting the frequency quantity and quality of communication more silences and less discussions 2 Includes restricting depth and breadth of communication 3 Also includes limiting time spent together C Stagnating to be stagnant is to be motionless or inactive 1 Verbal communication does not occur much 2 There is a sense it is unnecessary because we known how it will turn out
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