Weekly Notes: Week 4 CMN 134
Weekly Notes: Week 4 CMN 134 CMN 134
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This 4 page Class Notes was uploaded by Brittney Bui on Monday October 26, 2015. The Class Notes belongs to CMN 134 at University of California - Davis taught by Professor Puckering in Summer 2015. Since its upload, it has received 22 views. For similar materials see Interpersonal Communication in Communication Studies at University of California - Davis.
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Date Created: 10/26/15
Lecture 5 Thurs 1020 C Puckering CMN 134 SelfDisclosure Cont and Communicating Emotions Theorv of Communication Privacv Manadement CPM CPM attempts to explain our decision to reveal or conceal private information The theory argues that a tension exists between revealing information and concealing information The tension comes from wanting people to know who we are and like us but at the same time we afraid what they are going to do with that secret There is an equal burden on the sender AND receiver The sender must be very clear on what they want the receiver to do with that information and the receiver must abide by the sender s wish but if the sender is not clear that it s their deepest secret and if the receiver shares the secret with other people it s the sender s fault 1 We own our private information thus we would be able to control it 2 We needwant rules to manage personal and collective ownership of private information Listening We spend 70 of our waking time communicating with other people Formal Traininq Writing 9 10 yrs Reading 16 68 yrs Speaking 30 12 yrs Less than 1 yr If you don t have the receiver the message is pointless Effective communication must be TWOWAY communication This requires effective speaking AND listening Listening and hearing are NOT the same thing Hearing is the first step of listening Listening is coqnitive and emotional processind Listening is a highenergy process that requires a lot of effort and skill LISTENING EFFORT Common Roadblocks to Listenind 1 Tuning out dullirrelevant topics if it is not interesting to you 2 Faking attention 0 We are really good at pretending like we are listening 0 Remedy Pay attention 3 Yielding to distractions 0 Ex Cellphones during a conversation o Remedy Change your environment 4 Criticizing delivery or physical appearance 0 Sometimes your attention is focused on the person rather the message they are saying 0 Remedy Pay attention to what is being said not how it is being said 5 Jumping to conclusions 0 Interrupting with what the sender is saying to express what you predict they were going to say 0 Remedy Hear the speaker out 6 Interrupting 0 Tell about your insightsexperiences anything about what you want to say will make you very selfcentered o Remedy Wait until the speaker is finished 7 Overreacting to Emotional Words 0 Similar to jumping to conclusions 0 Remedy Stay calm and ask questions to clarify 8 Thought Speed 0 Average speaker speaks 100140 WPM 0 Average listener can understand 500650 WPM 0 Ex Spreading in debate Communicating Emotions The 6 Most Common Facial Expressions 1 Anger 2 Happiness 3 Disgust 4 Surprise 5 Sadness 6Fear Body Language Quiz Test Your Emotional Intelligence httpgreatergoodberekelyedueiquiz WILL BE TESTED ON THIS Know the difference between expressions Facial Deceit govern the appropriateness of expressive behavior and are used to regulate or manage one s expressive behavior 0 Often the expressionemotion that you see is not the emotionemotion the person feels It s up to the listener to decipher the real emotion Disolav Rules separate what you are feeling from what you are going to put out 0 When do we learn them Around age 6 Develop skill between 1St and 5th 0 Ex Acting surprisedhappy when you receive a lame gift but being able to pull of the fake emotion 0 Knowledge of display rules means you understand Expression Regulation you have to be able to regulate expressions Interpersonal Goals you have to have something that you re trying to accomplish that motivates you to separate emotion expressed VS emotion felt and to disconnect those two oz Ex Wanting your aunt to feel good about you liking this gift It s more important that she feels happy than you expressing your disgust for the gift 0 Display Rules 1 Masking you feel some emotion but you show a different emotion oz You re really good at concealing your real emotions with your body language voice eye contact etc oz Ex Faith Hill was not good at masking 2 lntensification when you actually feel an emotion but not at the intensity as you really should oz Ex Maybe you like the sweater but you don t love it So you show her how strongly you love it 3 Inhibition no reaction even though you feel something oz Ex Poker face 4 Deintensification when you show a very calm version of what you re feeling 393 Ex Doing well on an exam but your friends didn t so you don t want to brag but you re very happy 5 Simulation create something out of nothing oz Different than masking 393 You don t feel anything at allemotional reaction but you feel like you should oz Ex When someone s pet dies that you had no connection with you have to show compassion As a listener you have to look for cognitive AND emotional content It s your job to pay attention to both and recognize these display rules Some people are really good at it so you should be very attentive to everything from verbal and nonverbal cues Affection Exchande Theorv Kory Floyd Affectionafe Communication 0 Behavior that conveys feelings of fondness and positive regard and are generally received as such by the receivers Why do we engage in doing this How do we do it And what are the impacts when we give and receive affection Looking affection from a biological standpoint o Argument we give and receive affection for SURVIVAL If we show affection we get support from that which will increase the chance for reproducing Forms of Affectionate Communication 0 Verbal Communication Things we say to someone to let them know they are very important to us Compliments I love you 0 Direct Nonverbal Physical contact hugging holding hands kissing A soft warm tone of voice Very friendly facial expressions 0 Indirect Nonverbal Helping people when they need help Ex Making a meal for somebody doing someone s laundry Affectionate Communication Relationships AFFECTIONATE COMMUNICATION SURVIVAL Affectionate Communication Health 0 Receiving affectionate behavior 0 Positive impact to both physical and mental health 0 Expressinggiving affection 0 People who give affection are mentally and physically healthier than less affectionate people 0 It s MORE beneficial to your health to GIVE affection rather than RECEIVING affection 0 Outcomes selfesteem general mental health social engagement life satisfaction less likely to be depressed and stressed 0 Be a good listener and reach out to help people not only to serve them but to serve yourself as well
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