PSYX 233 Love and Relationships Notes
PSYX 233 Love and Relationships Notes PSYX 233 - 01
Popular in Fund of Psychology of Aging
PSYX 233 - 01
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This 7 page Class Notes was uploaded by Rachel Notetaker on Friday December 4, 2015. The Class Notes belongs to PSYX 233 - 01 at University of Montana taught by Christa Marie Neuman (P) in Fall 2015. Since its upload, it has received 23 views. For similar materials see Fund of Psychology of Aging in Psychlogy at University of Montana.
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Date Created: 12/04/15
Chapter 11 Relationships 1 Friendship a Provides many benefits b Reciprocity and choice c Three broad themes underlie adult friendships i Affective or emotional basis ii Shared or communal nature iii Sociability and compatibility d Developmental aspects of friendships and socioemotional selectivity i Why are friends so important to older adults 1 Concerns about being a burden on their families a Friends help each other foster independence 2 Older adults tend to have fewer relationships than people in mid life and young adulthood a Habit of not making new friends as old ones diemove away ii Socioemotionalselectivity 1 Social contact is motivated by a variety of goals a Information seekingyounger i What kinds of clothes should we wear ii Where should we go on Friday night iii How do we function as a social being b Selfconcept i Solid sense of self based on what you like as a person ii Fosteringindependence iii Cultural influence 1 Being a part of a sorority c Emotional regulation older adults i Support sought in friendship e Men Women s and Crosssex friendships i Men s and women s friendship ten to differ in adulthood ii Reflect learned behaviors from childhood iii Friendships between men and women 1 Lower levels of dating anxiety and capacity for intimacy a May also work the other way at times b Depends on personal characteristics 2 Similar to cross ethnic friendships a Being able to gain different perspectives 3 Crossgender friendships tend to be difficult to maintain a Hard to define how friendships carry over to when one party becomes involved in a romantic relationship 2 Love through adulthood a Sternberg has identified three components of love i Passion ii Intimacy iii Commitment 1 Ideally good love relationships have all three components b Falling in love i Assortative mating 1 Based on similarity to each other ii Homogamy 1 The degree to which people are similar 2 Meeting at school is most likely to have homogamy a Studies on quotthe exposure affect b The Bridge Study biological orientation on attraction i Environment plays a role iii An increasing number of people meet online iv Culture is a powerful force in shaping mate selection choices 1 Hookup culture sometimes people hookup without even knowing each others names Whacky 2 Culture all learned behavior 3 Arranged marriages versus choice marriages 3 Violence in relationships a Occurs when one person becomes aggressive toward the partner i Battered woman syndrome belief that she cannot leave the abusive situation ii quotBoiling a frog analogy not knowing it s time to leave until it s too late b The causes of aggression become more complex as the level of aggression increases i Most of the time the aggressor is in need of help and could benefit from treatment ii Most aggression normally begins small and becomes more serious as the problem persists c Culture is an important contextual factor i Violence on TVvideo games are not causes but part of the culture ii Patriarchal societies condone violence more 1 Also puts more pressure on the male a Underreporting violence against the male is a large issue as society treats it as not as serious 2 Doesn t mean that men are the cause of violence but it is more expected d Elder abuse neglect and exploitation i Several categories 5 6 7 PWN Physical Sexual Emotionalpsychological Financialmaterial exploitation a One of the most common b People taking disability checks Abandonment Neglect Selfneglect ii 1 in 4 vulnerable older adults are at risk for abuse neglect or exploitation 4 Lifestyles and Love Relationships a Singlehood i Men tend to stay single longer 1 2 Fewer men than women remain unmarried throughout adulthood Men normally pick younger women to marry ii Ethnic differences in singlehood 1 2 Nearly twice as many African Americans are single during young adulthood as European Americans Cultural differences around parentingstaying together iii The decision to never marry is a gradual one 1 2 3 b Cohabha on You would weigh the benefits and compromises you make by not marrying More people either wait to marry or end up never marrying Marriage is taking a backseat to procreation i In committed intimate sexual relationships without marriage ii Becoming an increasingly popular lifestyle choice iii Couples cohabitate for three main reasons 1 2 Convenience sharing expenses sexualaccessibility a Parttime or limited cohabitation Couples are engaging in a trial marriage with an intent on marrying a Trying things out Chores and dishes b Premaritalcohabitation Longterm commitment that is a marriage in fact but lacking official sanction a There is an idea that marriage is a more serious commitment is on its way out b Substitute marriage 5 Gay and Lesbian couples a One many relationship dimensions gay male and lesbian couples are similar to married couples i Including finances and household chores b Gender differences are more important than sexual orientation i Gay men tend to separate love and sex and have more shortterm relationships ii Lesbian and heterosexual women are more likely to connect sex and emotional intimacy in fewer longer lasting relationships iii Gay and lesbian couples often report less support from family members than do married or cohabiting heterosexual couples 1 These ideals are changing as the culture changes 2 Homosexual marriage is now legal iv HOWEVER these statements are generalizations of gender norms based on statistical averages and can t necessarily be applied to the individual 1 In this case the sample is not truly representative of the population 6 Marriage a f The median age of first marriage is increasinghas increased over the last few decades Marital success umbrella term any marital outcomes influenced by several factors i Age of the two partners at time of marriage ii Homogamy marriage based on similarity iii Feelings of equality 1 Exchange theory Each partner contributing something to the relationship that the other would be hard pressed to provide Marital quality subjective evaluation of the couple39s relationship Marital adjustment the degree spouses accommodate each other Marital satisfaction a global assessment of one39s marriage i Fluctuates throughout life 1 Highest at the beginning of the marriage a Early in a marriage the couple must adjust to different perceptions and expectations b As couples settle in a routine marital satisfaction tends to decHne 2 Tends to decline with birth of a child 3 Falls until children leave home a For some middleaged couples it remains low b Married Singles emotionally divorced and living as house mates 4 Rises again in later life a Older couples have reduced potential for marital conflict and greater potential for pleasure VulnerabilityStressAdaptation Model marital quality is a dynamic process resulting from the couple39s ability to handle stressful events g Caring for a spousepartner i Division of labor must be readjusted 7 Divorce a ii Marital satisfaction lower than for healthy couples iii Providing fulltime care for a partner is both stressful and rewarding Divorce in the US is common and rates are higher than in many other countries i Gottman and Levenson two models to predict divorce 1 2 Ea rly within first 7 yea rs Late when first child reaches 14 b Covenant marriage makes divorce harder to obtain i Legal distinction where spouses agree to get premarital counseling setting specific rules C 1 2 3 4 5 The other spouse committed adultery The other spouse committed a felony The other spouse is substance abuse The other spouse has physicallysexually assaulted the spouse or cthren The spouses have been living apart for a specific amount of time ii Argued to be a violation of separation of church and state Divorce may impair wellbeing even several years later i Divorce hangover inability to quotlet goquot 1 More common in men ii Divorce in middle or late life 1 Middleaged divorced women often face financial problems 2 3 8 Remarriage Despite adjustment problems the vast majority of divorced people remarry i usually wait about 35 years to remarry 1 Could depend on the age of the couples when divorce occurred b Few differences between first marriages and remarriages i 2nd marriages have 25 higher risk of dissolution than lst marriages 1 Except African American marriages ii Second marriage rates are lower for older divorced women Remarriage in later life appears to be very happy especially if the partners were a a Could be because mothers normally get custody of the cthren If the woman initiates divorce she reports selffocused growth and optimism If man initiates the woman tends to ruminate and feel vulnerable i In this case the biggest problem is usually resistance by adult children Experiencing the death of one39s spouse is a traumatic event but is highly likely Reactions to widowhood depend on the quality of the marriage c widowed 9 Widowhood a b c Widowed people are vulnerable to being abandoned by their couplesbased friendship network Gender differences i Widowhood is more common among women because they tend to marry older men ii Widowed men are typically older than widowed women iii Men are more likely to die soon after their spouse 1 Either by suicide or natural causes 10 Parenthood a An increasing number of couples are childfree i Financial reasons are common ii Couples in the US are having fewer children later on in life 1 Being older at the birth of the first child is advantageous 2 Teen moms may have harder times adjusting to parenthood 3 Women want to have a stable job before raising children a Roles in relationships are becoming more equal b Nuclear family consists only of parents and children c Extended family grandparents and other relatives live with parents and children d Ethnic Diversity i African American 1 Husbands more likely to help with household chores 2 Provide a cohesive loving environment within a context of strong religious belief ii Native American 1 Traditional cultural parenting skills have been lost iii Latino American 1 Familism wellbeing of family takes precedence over the concerns of individual family members a Larger families living together or close to each other 2 Extended family is important iv Asian American 1 Values familism 2 Higher value on extended family e Single parents i Mostly women ii Experience frustration guilt and a need to be overindulgent iii Financially less welloff 1 Integrating work and parenthood difficult iv Dating is a particular concern for many divorced single parents f Step Foster and SameSex Couple Parenting i Few differences among parents who have their own biological children versus those who do not ii Children adopted from another culture may need connection to culture of origin iii Foster parents have the most tenuous relationships iv No adverse consequences for gaylesbian parents 11 Midlife issues a Adult children i Kinkeeper the person who gathers family members together ii Sandwich generation middle aged parents caught between their children and their parents as caregivers iii When children leave home most parents manage the transition successfully 1 Roughly half of young adults return home at least once b Caring for one39s parents i Filial obligation to care for one39s parents when necessary ii 50 million American provide care for older parents inlaws grandparents iii Two main sources of stress 1 Trouble coping with parents39 declines 2 When the caregiving role infringes on the adult child39s other responsibilities iv The parents lose independenceautonomy 12 Grandparenthood a Interactions with grandchildren i Pass on skills religious social and vocational values ii allowed to keep in touch with youth through interaction b Ethnic differences i Intergenerational relationships are more important in some cultures than others 1 African American Latino American etc 2 Ties in with familism ii Native American grandparents help connect grandchildren to their cultural heritage c Care for grandchildren i Becoming more common ii Grandparents as fulltime guardians face more stress and role disruption than noncustodial grandparents